Couch 212: The French Vanilla couch

This week I learned that there is an online forum for private practice therapists in my city. I like to imagine that it is an exact mirror image of this forum...

Sample post:

I was just reading a worksheet of suggested phrases for therapists to do at clients for different attachment styles (google diane heller - I can't post it or I would) titled "Languaging for attachment styles" - it is the goofiest thing I ever read. And it once again just reinforces why I found therapy to be so ridiculous. When I read what clients think of as wise things the therapist said - I am just baffled. Although some things people report as wise pop up in these lists those people make and sell to others of their ilk. I wanted the therapist to say wise things (and by wise I mean something more than one could get from a self help book, general common sense, or a fortune cookie)- I really did - but they failed.

"Temba, his arms wide"
(sorry, gratuitous Star Trek reference from one of the best episodes)

Is this how normal people do relationships? If so, boy, I've been doing it wrong for a long time. No wonder my life is so messed up.

Can I have a link to this list? I'm wondering if I'm doing it wrong too

Edit: found it and hmmmmm... A lot of the phrases feel very stilted to me.

Link: https://www.attachmentmastery.com/wp...attachment.pdf

She also has a video: Video 1: Language of Attachment - Trauma Solutions

Yes, it's a bit stilted, but it is warranted - she is spelling things out for the first time, basic emotional interactional steps. Its hard to read, emotional work. It is kind of ironic to read right now in this time of social distancing. But if i ever get near another person again...

Today is my seventh day in a row at work. I’m exhausted. Not so much from working but because I can’t sleep—I wake up every few hours and have a hard time getting back to sleep. I’m hoping I’ll be able to sleep on my day off.

Thanks for doing what you do, chihiro. I'm sending you all my sleepytime vibes. My favorite insomnia trick is to run through multiplication tables in my head as methodically as possible (starting with 1x1 and going all the way to 12x12). I almost never make it past the sixes.

BTW, I am thinking about sewing homemade masks since I have heard horror stories of nurses using freaking bandanas on COVID floors. Do you think this would be useful? It seems like very much not enough protection but I guess it's better than a bandana?

Kept my regular blood donation appointment this morning. I was absurdly excited to be leaving my house and interacting with people who are not my family. Really glad to see that the place is full and everybody is engaging in proper social distancing. They spaced the waiting room and donation chairs further apart and they even took my temperature at the door.

Thanks for doing that, EM.

It's not a total brag; I'm mostly in it for the cookies and occasional free t-shirt.

ETA: I wish I had a cool blood type like AB or O-, but alas, I am boring A+.

Lol, I think I'm A+ as well? H may be O, though must be O+, or I'd have had to take the Rh factor treatment thing while I was pregnant, which I didn't.

I think the pregnant person only has to do the Rh factor thing if they have a negative blood type and the fetus might have a positive one...

Oh, that might be what it is! Whatever it was, it wasn't an issue for me.

And thanks for all your work, Chihiro.

The jury is still out on cloth masks. I saw one study suggesting that viral transmission was actually worse with cloth masks (A cluster randomised trial of cloth masks compared with medical masks in healthcare workers | BMJ Open). But the CDC hasn’t ruled it out as a future possibility (Simple Respiratory Mask - Volume 12, Number 6—June 2006 - Emerging Infectious Diseases journal - CDC).

So my dad keeps calling "shelter in place" "shelter down."
Perhaps a combination of shelter in place + hunker (or buckle) down?

Feeling a bit better after Dr. T sent a really supportive email reply this morning. Lots of empathy. A few suggestions. And a reminder that this isolation situation is temporary and that I'll get through it.

I kind of like it.

Buckle down to shelter in place.

Hunker down you hairy dogs - Univ of GA.

Morning couch. I'm working today or well, I was for the past 4 hours but at the moment my whole team lost network connectivity whee so I am just chillin' out here until it comes back up!

Considering asking R for a phone call in a couple of weeks. Mid-April is typically a dicey time for me.

The last time she offered, I declined...but the circumstances were totally different then, and in person was still possible.


What say the Couch? Is it worth an ask?

Walked to the supermarket a couple miles away (egg sale, though limited myself to 1 although 2 were allowed). Checkout line seemed endless. Guy behind me and I chatted and ended up exchanging numbers to set up a date after this is over.

Love in the Time of Cholera.