[meadowbria]

I have seen a therapist 6 times so far and she has been rude quite a few times. The very first time I spoke to her I expressed how my brother is verbally abusive and even mean. Her response was to make a face and say "he sounds like a real terrorist". I did not like that coming from a professional. I did not ask for her opinion of him and the opinion she gave was offensive. What would have been helpful would be to hear something compassionate such as "that must really hurt". I also told her I am single and not dating anyone and live in a small town. Without even asking her she said "Why are you living THERE. Have you considered moving somewhere else that is more interesting, like Atlanta or NYC". I was shocked. I don't mind my small town and was not asking for advice on moving. I was merely introducing myself to her. I went on to say that although I am a college graduate, I am depressed right now and grieving and find it hard to work full time. To that end, I am substitute teaching. She made a face and said "HOW DID YOU GET INTO THIS SITUATION?" in a condescending manner. I realize I have a college degree but that does mean I should be living high on the hog? Everything I say gets a negative comment from her. I want to tell her I no longer wish to continue. I am not sure if I should do it in person. Any input would be helpful. Thank you.

[ArtieTheSequal]

Goodness, I'm sorry she spoke to you that way. It sounds like she may not be a good fit for where you are right now. I wish I had the right words.... I'm the last person to talk about this subject really, as I stayed with long-term t waaaaaay longer than I should have (10+ years) because the relationship got so entangled or something and I felt trapped for a long time before I finally left; but I wanted to chip in at least this thought: listen to your gut and go from there. I wish now that I had done that sooner than I did.

I do think that after only 6 sessions you wouldn't necessarily have to tell her in person if it's too uncomfortable for you. I wish you all the best! hugs if wanted.

[justbreathe1994]

That does sound tough. I would find those things upsetting too.

I recently broke up with my T for similar reasons. From the beginning, I noticed every other thing that came out of her mouth would trigger me. It came to the point where I had to pick my battles when bringing up the most triggering comments, but even then, she told me I was just being confrontational and sensitive (even though I was very calm
about it and focused on how I felt).

Ultimately, I decided I couldn’t bear it anymore and decided to stop therapy with her. I chose not to go back and instead told her this over text because I felt like a face to face conversation with her would not be constructive. I thought she’d just get frustrated with me for asserting my needs. Idk if that’s your situation, but I personally wouldn’t feel obligated to go back and say it face to face unless it felt safe to do so and I felt she’d be open to hearing what I had to say.

[ElectricManatee]

Frankly, if I felt things were going this poorly, I would not waste the money to tell her in another session. It's perfectly fine to send an email or leave a voicemail after hours to tell her that you wish to cancel all future appointments (or your next one, if that's all you have scheduled). That way you won't get drawn into feeling obligated to give an explanation, which you don't owe her anyway.

[divine1966]

She sounds awful. I’d send an email that you are done and don’t want to continue.

[Just42dayK]

That stinks. “Terrorist” really? Gosh

Leaving sounds like a great decision. How to do it could depend completely on what you want and need. A cancel next session(s) text with no explanation is fine. If you want to do it in person for any reason, or want to tell her why, how you feel about her as a therapist, defend yourself, give her a piece of your mind etc., then do that. What do you need? How do you need it to end?

Hope you find a better T that’s fits with you better.

[SalingerEsme]

She lacks attunement skills, which is such an important part of therapy. The right therapist is out there waiting for you.

[LonesomeTonight]

I agree with the others that stopping therapy with her seems the best option. And unless you really feel a need to have a final session with her, I'd just cancel over email, text, or phone (however you communicate with her). If you'd been seeing her longer and this just happened to be a bad stretch, then I'd try to talk to her about it. But if she said all this in just 6 sessions, then she doesn't sound like the right T for you (or for anyone!) And I say this as someone with a long-term T who can be quite blunt at times.

[Marie123]

She is unprofessional and clueless. The book: The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans saved my life