[Crook32]

One flaw of my new T is he is a little too cheery and high energy. The other T I wanted to see is more down to business and said most of her clients would call her a ***** because she doesn’t sugar coat things and pushes you to do the work. They are so different and human compared to my last T who put up a brick wall between us.

[RoxanneToto]

Do you think your feelings might change if you stick with him, for a while at least? I get what you mean, though. Upbeat and cheery therapists (and brick wall therapists!) don’t suit everyone’s needs, so I hope you can find someone more suitable if you don’t think it’s going to work out with this one.

[Mountaindewed]

My therapist was super upbeat and happy and sugar coating everything then her moods crashed suddenly for no reason and she’s been a ***** to deal with ever since.

Maybe yours will be cherry at the start but then will end up being calmer and more business the longer you work with him.

[Amyjay]

I hate upbeat Ts, I have met a few of them. I am definitely not upbeat and cheery, and honestly who would be with a history like mine.
So, upbeat and cheery Ts feel to me like they can't relate, they don't understand, they don't connect, and they don't give a ****.
I have a colleague who drives me nuts , she does this woo woo stuff and insists that I can change my whole life by thinking different thoughts.
Get *****ed, is what I think.

[Flinders40]

This is an extreme on both ends. They would drive me crazy. Is it possible to find someone who’s in between cheery and a b——?

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by Amyjay

I hate upbeat Ts, I have met a few of them. I am definitely not upbeat and cheery, and honestly who would be with a history like mine.
So, upbeat and cheery Ts feel to me like they can't relate, they don't understand, they don't connect, and they don't give a ****.
I have a colleague who drives me nuts , she does this woo woo stuff and insists that I can change my whole life by thinking different thoughts.
Get *****ed, is what I think.

Hilarious about your co-worker

[Crook32]

People don’t understand that we can’t just smile our way through depression. I think my T thought I was joking when I told him he needed to stop being so cheery. He went on to say he loves life and finally has his dream job and gets time to workout too. He just doesn’t relate to where I am. Maybe it is not having empathy. He is a new T.

[nottrustin]

In the beginning current T seemed to cheery and sicky sweet. Honestly, while she is a sweet and cheery person I honestly think it was anxiety. I have come to realize she struggles with anxiety and works hard to keep it under control.

[LonesomeTonight]

Originally Posted by Crook32

People don’t understand that we can’t just smile our way through depression. I think my T thought I was joking when I told him he needed to stop being so cheery. He went on to say he loves life and finally has his dream job and gets time to workout too. He just doesn’t relate to where I am. Maybe it is not having empathy. He is a new T.

Ugh, this would really bother me. I mean, I'm not into cheery people in general (my T seems like a realist with a dark sense of humor). But for him to say he loves life and has his dream job? That sounds very out of touch with whatever is going on with the client. (I mean, unless a client said that, and he said "so do I!")

I'd say something about those comments, about how it feels like he isn't empathizing. That he's acting like his life is perfect, so it's difficult for you to believe he understands what you're going through. Or something like that.


Ex-T wasn't overly cheery, but it makes me think about her talking about going out on her boat. There was this part of me that thought "that must be nice, to be on your boat" (and she lived in a pricey area on the water). Even though I actually don't like boats. Or when I'd compliment an outfit, and she'd say "I love Nordstrom." Where I could maybe buy something on clearance at Nordstrom Rack...

[Crook32]

I emailed him and told him. He said he will try to change his approach. He was glad I told him. I also wrote back that I am scared if my depression gets bad again and suicidal ideation returns he won’t be able to handle it. He has also told me we had to stop a session early because his next client kept texting how suicidal he was.

[emmaleemochizuki]

That are times when my T response in a very high voice suddenly (you know the kind of very girly high pitched voice).

It honestly scares me every time but I suppose I get used to it.

I usually talk with a very androgynous kind of voice. I am a girl by the way, but I suppose it's been of a contrast to my T.

But she does act calm, whatever I tell her, and I find that more helpful than someone a bit more emotional.