Reality vs Memory

A lot of the time my memories feel unreal, like a lucid dream, even a day after it happened. And a week after that, I'm not sure if I remember it correctly, like I might have made parts of it up.

For instance, I am attending therapy every second week. It's been about 10 days since the last session and it feels like it never happened, even though of course it did.

Thoughts?

I experience this too, and I think it's normal to a point..but it happens more to me if I'm dissociating or have something else on my mind. Are there certain types of events you think you have made up or is it random things?

In sessions I'm particularly bad at
remembering positive things he said. Sometimes I tell him 'but you said xyz last week..' and he says he never said that. People know my name and frequently talk to me in public as if they know my, but I have no memory of meeting them before. It's so odd.

It's any conversation ever, really. I'm never quite sure what was said. I don't reality check it, either. Like when I'm not sure something was said, I'll just avoid the subject alltogether. I also do that in therapy, so he doesn't get the chance to tell me he hasn't said that, because I'll never bring it up. I also frequently feel like I've been places before, or I've watched full series before, and I'm not sure if that's the case or not.

I don't get people in public telling me they know me though. That sounds kind of scary. I'm sorry you are going through that..

That’s scary, Lostislost - is it the same people who talk to you each time? Would it help to ask how they know you? Also, I’m not sure what to think of your T. Some people do say something one day then totally deny it later. Not saying this is what he’s doing, but it’s concerning either way. Do you ever take notes in session? Not sure if that would help.
For what it’s worth, some people I’ve known before would sometimes say XYZ in a text, then later deny it. But I’d usually still have the text proving they did say it!

Ohh my, the amount of times someone has asked me if I've seen a movie or been somewhere and I say no! And my partner says....yes you have, we watched or went there together lol. It's become a bit of a joke here cos I do it so often, so I totally get what you mean there.

It can definitely be scary..
Sometimes it has been the same people asking, but it seems a lot of them! More when I used to work in a city centre, but I don't anymore. It was usually men so I felt intimidated to ask incase I didn't like their answer. But sometimes it was like a supermarket worker, who commented 'oh twice in one day! Did you forget something?' when I know I had only been there once that day (I think?!)..if they didn't know my name id think I had a twin walking around, but that seems quite unlikely.

You know I have actually thought about recording therapy sessions for that reason! Thanks, maybe I shouldn't be so ready to believe everything he says, you are right.

This is the story of my life. It can get frustrating, particularly with my husband because I feel like he uses it against me at times. Like literally anytime something of his is missing, he tells me I lost it because he knows I won’t remember either way. I know I can’t be losing all his stuff, especially things I have no use for.
I’ve always had terrible memory/brain fog (probably from trauma idk), but it’s gotten much worse after having covid in december.

Omg I totally get this! These days it happens most at work, people will talk to me and know my name as if we worked together before, but I have zero recollection.

Also happens a lot, like way more than it should, when someone from high school or college will message me and I have to ask how I know them and they’ll be like “oh you don’t remember? We went to xxxx school together.” And I still have no idea but they seem to know me well. It’s a strange feeling.

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That's not very nice of him. Do you think he realizes he is doing it?
My sister has, of late (since I started therapy) seemed to try and force memory into me. She often asks "do you remember xyz..." like out of the blue. Just to annoy me. (Obviously not to annoy me, but she might as well shake me and yell at me to get better).

I hope it gets better after a few months

I’m not sure if he realizes it or not. I know he’s trying to be in control, but idk if this has anything to do with that.

That’s so frustrating! Have you mentioned to her that it bothers you? Or would you feel comfortable telling her that? I was also gonna ask, regarding your original post, do you have a hx of trauma? Only if you feel comfortable sharing of course. I ask because I do have trauma, and I think it’s a major factor of why my memory sucks and things feel unreal.

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I hope it doesn't happen so much as to put a strain on your relationship

I have told her in specific situations that I don't want to talk about it, but I guess I am avoiding a real discussion. There's a lot we have to talk about, really. I feel she is generally hogging me and now even telling me off for putting my studies before spending time with her and her son. She also tells my father off, it's not just me. And both him and me do spend time with them, just not as frequently as she wants. So I guess I really have to talk to her about these things, even though I really don't want to. I wish she would just take a hint.

It's okay to ask, but I'm not sure how to answer. I guess my mom kind of neglected me and my father wasn't there. She also drank later on and I generally took responsibility for her emotional needs until I was in my early teens and moved to my father (they split up at some point). She also hit me a tad little bit until I was 9, but I always knew it could be worse because there were kids in my family who had it much worse (cousins of mine).
Other than that I am not sure. There are some years (between the age of 3 and 6) that I don't really remember much from. I did recently remember one thing that might develop into remembering what I'm gonna call "proper" trauma for lack of a better word, but I can't really say, because I don't recall enough of it. It would explain a lot tbh, not just my memory deficit. But I'm fine with the memory coming slowly, rather than being overwhelmed (if there is anything there, that is, which there might not be).