Containing 'stuff' between sessions

LostOnTheTrail · Dec 06, 2022, 12:12 PM

Hi, all.

I hope you're doing as well as possible.
I'm well acquainted with the power of writing, but I've noticed lately that I'm having trouble convincing myself to sit down and journal between therapy sessions, which used to be my main strategy for getting the ugly stuff out of my head.

What do you do with the stuff that hangs around after a session, if you can't actually set it down?

Talking to people around me is hard, because they only know part of the story.

Thanks,

Lost

Dec 06, 2022, 12:44 PM

It partly depends on whether I want to contain it, process it, forget about it, learn more about it, etc. What do you want to do with the material?

I write creatively, I journal, I swim, I create something from clay, I do something somatic (yoga stretches mostly), work with images.

I find the somatic stuff helps me process things in a different way - more holistically and less cognitively based. It is a huge challenge for me to do work in this way because I am in my head a lot, but I think it moves things along in a more primal way. I have also worked with a somatic therapist so that helps direct me with what to do, might be different if you haven't done somatic work.

LostOnTheTrail · Dec 06, 2022, 12:52 PM

Thanks, CM.

That's an interesting question.
My aim is to contain this until I can continue to process, next week and beyond.

My therapist tends to offer somatic/body based stuff when she can see that I'm distressed.

Funnily enough, I've felt the need to 'do something' with this new experience for a while.

Maybe I need to take some time over the festive break to think about what that looks like.

Dec 06, 2022, 01:16 PM

The work I did with the somatic therapist was really good. It was very different from talk therapy and was more in depth than breathing or grounding techniques. I would recommend it. The stuff I did was for trauma release around childhood sexual abuse and it really helped me find my body in a way I had not felt able to experience before. We didn't do stretches, but it's why I like doing stretches now - it's a similar exploration for me. Developing an embodied experience of myself has been huge for me. Actually, I might book a session with the somatic therapist soon. I could do with something embodied going on! Sorry, I am hijacking a bit.

smileygal · Dec 06, 2022, 02:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by comrademoomoo

The work I did with the somatic therapist was really good. It was very different from talk therapy and was more in depth than breathing or grounding techniques. I would recommend it. The stuff I did was for trauma release around childhood sexual abuse and it really helped me find my body in a way I had not felt able to experience before. We didn't do stretches, but it's why I like doing stretches now - it's a similar exploration for me. Developing an embodied experience of myself has been huge for me. Actually, I might book a session with the somatic therapist soon. I could do with something embodied going on! Sorry, I am hijacking a bit.

Don't meant to hijack this thread but somatic work has also really helped me after years of feeling stuck in talk therapy....I used to hate stretching, yoga, anything that required any level of stillness for more than 2 seconds...I couldn't understand how people felt relief when stretching...I was like a frozen elastic band...still am at times....The one thing somatics has helped me is to like stretching more.

SlumberKitty · Dec 06, 2022, 03:03 PM

Hi Lost,

Sometimes painting helps me. Nothing rigid or formal, just getting paint on the canvas. I don't know. There's something cathartic about it. But if you need to tell someone, you could always write/journal about the art and how you felt doing it and what emotions it brought up.

Just an idea.

HUGS

Kit

ElectricManatee · Dec 06, 2022, 08:10 PM

Sometimes I find this container exercise helpful.

Omers · Dec 08, 2022, 08:51 PM

I am struggling with this a lot with new T. Awesome T let me send unlimited emails. He didn't promise to be able to keep up or read them fast enough to keep up... but he would eventually read all of them (and he did).
New T has different boundaries and is far more protective of his private time.
I don't like writing without someone to read it.
This week I found myself writing awesome T about new T and realized that I need to stop. Awesome T replied and he is OK with it but I am not and need to not get into the habit of turning to him to contain my work with my new T.

So... I am feeling very alone and isolated. Struggling to contain... doubled down on self care and still feel awful.

ScarletPimpernel · Dec 08, 2022, 10:21 PM

Maybe new T isn't a good fit for you?

I usually email L after sessions. Sometimes I come here to help process. Other times, I might do an art project. I know L journals or sometimes goes to the gym.

Omers · Dec 09, 2022, 06:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel

Maybe new T isn't a good fit for you?

New T has big shoes to fill after awesome T and he is catching on really quick. It hurts me a lot to say it but new T can bring me a deeper level of healing that what I could have done with awesome T had he not retired. New T did a somatic healing session with me last week that totally shook my world, disoriented me, went places I never thought I could go, kept me feeling safe and opened up new possibilities.

Wow... lots of anger and defensiveness.

OK, compromise... I will let new T know tonight that I am having trouble containing... but I also think it is very reasonable that I be expected to try and find more resources outside of T.

Thanks ScareltPimpernel

InkyBooky · Dec 10, 2022, 08:14 PM

I also struggle with this sometimes, but it has gotten so much better over the past couple of years. My most recent therapist has helped me tremendously in this regard. Without his help in learning to cope and self regulate I don't know where I'd be.

Possible trigger:

I have a background of childhood abuse and neglect, but I always prided myself on my ability to cope and carry on. However, the tipping point for me was losing my 30 yr old brother to suicide five years ago. Everything else pales in comparison. It was a traumatic death made even harder by the fact that he spent several days on life support so that we could donate his organs (which was his wish). Fortunately all of his organs were able to be donated and many lives were changed and saved by him. But that week of holding his hand in the ICU and knowing he would never recover sent me into a deep depression. I couldn't self-regulate following that, partly because the trigger for my depression was his death...and I thought that no one wants to talk about suicide or hear about it (I was wrong, btw). I was ashamed so I self isolated and struggled to open up to anyone about my experience...which obviously just made everything worse.

I agree with everyone else that the somatic work is so helpful. For me, I find that hiking and walking (moving my body outdoors) is one of my key coping skills. I also think that finding someone you can talk to can be helpful to overcoming problems with self regulation and coping between sessions. Whether it's emailing your therapist for a check-in or finding a trusted friend or even support group, being able to talk (vent) openly and honestly is so important. Maybe even posting here can be a release that allows your other coping skills to get a foot hold.

SalingerEsme · Dec 11, 2022, 09:23 AM

My therapist made me a Lovingkindness mediation in his own voice. I find this so containing.

Jesla · Dec 12, 2022, 09:18 PM

I text my therapist, email her, and i also make collages using an app on my ipad to send to her to get my feelings out.

Menu

Containing 'stuff' between sessions

My Support Forums