Couch 243: Winchester Cathedral

Some sessions can feel like an anticlimax. Especially when thoughts and feelings have been ultra heightened during the week. You spend days anticipating the session and what you intend to say, and when it arrives, particularly if you're in a different headspace, everything feels rather flat. It can be disappointing and a bit of a letdown. That's when having some notes or a journal to refer to can help. You might not be in the same emotional state, but you can talk about what was going on for you at the time when you wrote it. Sometimes it can help to have that distance, gives you a different perspective.

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I'm sorry it wasn't that helpful, Kit.

I know what you mean, too, about a session not being great, but also nothing clearly seeming "wrong" about it. Where it just sort of happened. Then it's over until the next one.

This. You’re absolutely right. ALL the value is in the setting of goals, trying to push yourself (even if you fall short of the overall) and in the satisfaction and health benefits of increasing your fitness and activity...regardless of whether you walk an extra 100 miles or 10 miles. Hopefully you can be proud of yourself for any increase over your normal. And the fundraising challenge can serve as fun accountability and motivation...rather than a “test” to be aced or failed. It doesn’t have to be so black and white. And you don’t have to place judgement on the outcome (or on yourself). Have fun with it!

What’s the saying….that goes something like “It’s not the destination but the journey that matters”. Was that an Emerson quote? Anyway, I like it.

Thanks, Inky, this helps to read. The irony is that my T says *I* tend to be too black and white about things. It seems in this case, he is as well.

I am playing with kava these days. I like making it more than drinking it

Is that that mushroom drink?

No wait thats kachava.

I have never tried kachava. Kava you have to beat and massage for a bit to prepare it.

@Una did your pharmacy sort out your insulin issues?

Yes thanks! They said it was a new guy who just didnt submit it to insurance. It was a real murphys law this month, one thing after another.

I can't even with Dr. T sometimes. In talking about the walking challenge, he said, first, that he was surprised I was so bothered by his reaction. I said how friends/my H were supportive of me, like everyone but him. He said he felt he had to react that way as my therapist, to let me know if he thought I was taking on more than I could manage and setting myself up for failure (or something like that).

He said it would be different if I were a friend. That then he'd tell the friend, "That's great, you can do it!" Then say to his wife later "So-and-so is never going to do that." How it's OK to lie to your friends. To which I said, "So you're suggesting that all of my friends are likely lying to me about this? Great, thanks!" He said they probably were.

Sigh... I mean, maybe he's right, but does he have to say that? Let me believe that people believe in me, for goodness' sake!

Had some productive discussion about phobias in the other part of the session, with some plans to address things once he gets back from his vacation. We plan to focus on less heavy topics on Friday, before he goes out of town.

Sorry, LT. That sounds so frustrating! HUGS Kit

Ugh... that's a really damaging thing for him to say. You're trying to believe the best in people...and that doesn't help.

Thanks, Kit!

Thanks, Lost. And yes, that's a good point--I tend to believe the best in people (other than myself). He's more of a cynical realist. I'm not sure how that viewpoint is helpful to clients in general.

I was also talking about how I'm converting steps to miles, so I'm including steps I take in the house or a store (I said on the Facebook fundraiser page that I'm doing this, so I'm being transparent). I said what my conversion rate is, and he doesn't think that's correct. He also said steps inside the house are shorter, so should count for less mileage. Like, WTF? Is he the charity fundraiser police? It's not like I'm claiming I ran a marathon. Can't he just be happy that I'm trying to be active and encourage me? Sigh...

LT - Dr. T is wrong. I know we're online friends, but I truly believe in you, that you can do it. It's not a lie or an exaggeration. And if for some reason, you are not able to meet your goal, I will still be proud of you because the effort and determination it takes work on a big goal like this.

Aw, thanks, Scarlet, that means a lot!

LT, I feel the same way. I think Dr T rather missed the mark on this one.

You have so much support from the Couch that I hope it drowns out Dr. T's idiocy on this particular matter.

LT, I’ve been trying to myself back to walking daily , you inspired to get myself out there today, and it felt good!
And I was thinking maybe all of us MSF cheerleaders should start a thread and we can write daily supportive words for you!

Aw, thanks, Artie!