Couch 247: Choose Cheese!

ArtieTheSequal · 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ArtieTheSequal

Thank you Lemoncake, that makes so much sense. I have written her several letters in my journal, and a handful of poems too, that will never be sent. These, toward finding that closure inside myself, because I really do believe that is the best way. I'm starting to see that this whole 'wanting a proper goodbye' thing is mostly the codependent need to be sure she's not mad at me (ie, to control how she feels about me). CoDA has been a big help in figuring that out!

I like your idea about the rock, too! And I'm going to try it this morning on my walk to see how it feels.

Follow-up: I did go for that walk and found an appropriate rock along the way, found a good place to throw it where I can't access to try to find it again (ha) sat with it a bit pouring my thoughts/feelings about all of this into the rock. There was a lovely breeze blowing through just then that felt like some kind of sign that letting it go is the right thing. So then I got up, turned around, and tossed the rock over the railing into the wash below (where there's already a ton of rocks). I said out loud "I'm letting it all go with that rock so I can move forward" then turned around again and walked back home, "leaving it behind" so to speak.

(I am aware I may likely have to do this several more times.)

I just wrote today's poem about the experience. We're on day 80 I think of the year-long challenge. And it's day 5 of National/Global Poetry Month.

stopdog · Apr 05, 2024 at 06:14 PM

I am not sure that all these big gestures are necessarily going to get rid of the feelings you seem so desperate to rid yourself of. In some ways, it might be more important to have the feelings and let them move through you rather than always trying to do something or have some symbolic act.
Just a thought.

ArtieTheSequal · Apr 05, 2024 at 07:34 PM

Actually, I feel like it will. Ritual can be a powerful thing. I've been doing a lot of sitting with my feelings about all of this, a lot of writing, instead of eating my feelings for the past week or so; and I felt like it was time to do something to symbolize moving forward from obsessing about something I can't change.

I know it's going to take time but today I feel like I took a step forward.

stopdog · Apr 05, 2024 at 07:45 PM

Then good luck with it.

I am not questioning ritual itself as being something some find useful in some situations. That was not what I was trying to say. Not even close.

stopdog · Apr 05, 2024 at 08:01 PM

I am in a legal cannabis state and have a med card but never really grew up knowing much about it. In high school and college -the drummers were stoned but the rest of us mostly drank alcohol and didn't smoke. So I am having to learn how to use various implements to use to help with some chronic pain/sleep issues.
I need herb for dummies or something. I sit with the toys and start and stop youtube videos. So far I may be the only person who has completely flunked water pipe.

ArtieTheSequal · Apr 05, 2024 at 08:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stopdog

Then good luck with it.

I am not questioning ritual itself as being something some find useful in some situations. That was not what I was trying to say. Not even close.

I apologize for misunderstanding.

NP_Complete · Apr 05, 2024 at 08:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stopdog

I am in a legal cannabis state and have a med card but never really grew up knowing much about it. In high school and college -the drummers were stoned but the rest of us mostly drank alcohol and didn't smoke. So I am having to learn how to use various implements to use to help with some chronic pain/sleep issues.
I need herb for dummies or something. I sit with the toys and start and stop youtube videos. So far I may be the only person who has completely flunked water pipe.

You need enough water to cover the stem inside the pipe, but don't go crazy either. Probably a third of the way up the pipe is a reasonable amount. Cover the hole with your finger. Put your mouth into the top of the pipe and inhale while lighting. Inhale hard enough so you get the water moving and some bubbles. Once there is some smoke in the pipe, quit using your lighter, take your finger off the hole and inhale. But pace yourself or you'll inhale too much at once. You can always cover the top of the pipe with your hand and get the rest of the smoke later. If that is helpful, maybe my stoner 20's weren't a complete waste.

Also you want the cannabis in smallish pieces, but not dust-like or it'll burn up too fast. But also don't stick a whole stem in there either.

stopdog · Apr 05, 2024 at 08:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ArtieTheSequal

I apologize for misunderstanding.

I doubt we are any clearer to each other than exhankster and I are. There can be challenges in communicating when we come at life from such different angles.
But it is interesting to watch us all try.

stopdog · Apr 05, 2024 at 08:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NP_Complete

You need enough water to cover the stem inside the pipe, but don't go crazy either. Probably a third of the way up the pipe is a reasonable amount. Cover the hole with your finger. Put your mouth into the top of the pipe and inhale while lighting. Inhale hard enough so you get the water moving and some bubbles. Once there is some smoke in the pipe, quit using your lighter, take your finger off the hole and inhale. But pace yourself or you'll inhale too much at once. You can always cover the top of the pipe with your hand and get the rest of the smoke later. If that is helpful, maybe my stoner 20's weren't a complete waste.

Also you want the cannabis in smallish pieces, but not dust-like or it'll burn up too fast. But also don't stick a whole stem in there either.

Thanks - one of my attempts was ground too much and it just fell into the water - then I got a screen for the bowl. Mine doesn't have a hole -you just have to lift the bowl up itself. I didn't really know what to look for when I got my first one. I really got the water pipe (being fancy and all) to use with the vape but thus far am not coordinated to lift, inhale, and not knock something over or choke. And it tastes terrible - just like burned charcoal. I like it with the vape -just awful at it when I use it by itself.

atisketatasket · Apr 05, 2024 at 10:26 PM

I can see it now, topping the NYT bestseller list:

“The Couchies’ Guide to Using Cannabis”

We could start a whole dummies-type series!

“The Couchies’ Guide to Grammar and Punctuation”

“The Couchies’ Guide to Leaving Therapists”

And so on.

stopdog · Apr 05, 2024 at 10:36 PM

I had to get some friends to help me with making/keeping a joint lit - and it took a while to convince them I was serious and really didn't know what I was doing.

I might need the couchies guide to cannabis if you are in your dotage. In large print.

unaluna · Apr 05, 2024 at 10:37 PM

The couchies guide to coddling (foodstuffs and other fancies).

...to naming your companion animal.

stopdog · Apr 05, 2024 at 10:41 PM

Naming companion animal?

atisketatasket · Apr 05, 2024 at 10:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stopdog

Naming companion animal?

Yes, I think ex-hankster’s is a walrus.

unaluna · Apr 06, 2024 at 03:14 AM

No, I am the walrus.

Coo coo ca choob.

stopdog · Apr 06, 2024 at 11:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unaluna

No, I am the walrus.

Coo coo ca choob.

Walrus is better than the poo flinging monkey I thought would appeal to freudians

LonesomeTonight · Apr 06, 2024 at 11:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stopdog

I had to get some friends to help me with making/keeping a joint lit - and it took a while to convince them I was serious and really didn't know what I was doing.

I might need the couchies guide to cannabis if you are in your dotage. In large print.

I struggled the first time I smoked a cigarette (in college) to keep it lit. I asked, "Is there an art to keeping these things lit?" And the friend group teased me about it for a bit. (I did figure it out eventually!)

I've heard joints are more difficult. (I've only smoked one once, years ago, and was really drunk at the time.)

Now that it's legal for recreational use in my state (with numerous dispensaries), I've been tempted to buy some. But became overwhelmed with all the options. Plus reading how potent much of it is now. I need some sort of beginner sampler, with a couple edibles, a vape, some flower, a bowl, maybe a tincture, etc. Maybe at some point, I'll take the leap. (

Ha, it occurs to me that if his current plan works out, Dr. T's new office will be across the street from a dispensary.

unaluna · Apr 06, 2024 at 11:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stopdog

Walrus is better than the poo flinging monkey I thought would appeal to freudians

You are unaliving me here!

ArtieTheSequal · Apr 06, 2024 at 11:55 AM

(trigger for food issues/weight talk)

Possible trigger:

Today I am 9 days abstinent (per OA's definition: “The act of refraining from compulsive eating and compulsive food behaviors while working toward or maintaining a healthy weight.") I wonder how on earth I could have forgotten how good it feels to not be in a sugar fog all the time? I've lost back 4.5 lbs so far of the 30lbs I gained since October 2023. I am being tested though; H bought a cheesecake again today. That's one of my red (or trigger) foods, like chocolate/candy/cookies are. I've been fine so far with the chocolate he has in the pantry; it's not Reeses, so I've been able to ignore it. Once again, I am finding it is easier to just not eat it, than it would be to eat one serving then walk away. I don't know if I could manage to think that if Reeses were in the house. I knew I had a problem and needed help when I ordered that big bag of them off of Amazon then hid them in my office and ate them all in 2-3 days a couple weeks ago or so. This compulsive eating thing was something L could never help me with. I talked about it with her, but she didn't really understand it and wasn't able to help. I seem to be okay with other foods - I just have to stay away from processed sugar. I'm telling myself I'm allergic to it. Which I kinda am. It causes me to break out in compulsive eating.

unaluna · Apr 06, 2024 at 12:40 PM

Um - artie, what is HE doing, eating that stuff? That has got to be bad for his liver. Not that you need to be keeping tabs on him. But you suffer when he gets sick, so...

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atisketatasket Child of a lesser god Member Since Jun 2015 Location: Tartarus Posts: 19,193 (SuperPoster!) 9 12.4k hugs given	Apr 05, 2024 at 10:26 PM #850 I can see it now, topping the NYT bestseller list: “The Couchies’ Guide to Using Cannabis” We could start a whole dummies-type series! “The Couchies’ Guide to Grammar and Punctuation” “The Couchies’ Guide to Leaving Therapists” And so on. __________________ The secret to eternal youth is arrested development.—Alice Roosevelt Longworth

unaluna Elder Harridan x-hankster Member Since Jun 2011 Location: Milan/Michigan Posts: 40,194 (SuperPoster!) 13 67.2k hugs given	Apr 05, 2024 at 10:37 PM #852 The couchies guide to coddling (foodstuffs and other fancies). ...to naming your companion animal.

stopdog underdog is here Member Since Sep 2011 Location: blank Posts: 34,847 (SuperPoster!) 12 1 hugs given	Apr 05, 2024 at 10:41 PM #853 Naming companion animal? __________________ Please NO @ Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live. Oscar Wilde Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.

unaluna Elder Harridan x-hankster Member Since Jun 2011 Location: Milan/Michigan Posts: 40,194 (SuperPoster!) 13 67.2k hugs given	Apr 06, 2024 at 03:14 AM #855 No, I am the walrus. Coo coo ca choob.

unaluna Elder Harridan x-hankster Member Since Jun 2011 Location: Milan/Michigan Posts: 40,194 (SuperPoster!) 13 67.2k hugs given	Apr 06, 2024 at 12:40 PM #860 Um - artie, what is HE doing, eating that stuff? That has got to be bad for his liver. Not that you need to be keeping tabs on him. But you suffer when he gets sick, so...