Couch 250: An August Couch

Glad to hear it, Lost!

Thanks, Jersey! The date night did help--we played miniature golf, which was connecting. So much so that we played again last night (the last night we were there). The trip was quite challenging at times with D, but there were a fair number of good moments. Last night, H said he'd rate the vacation overall as "a solid B." I mostly agreed, though I think the first day/night was probably an F, or at least a D.

I think refusing to stay with family is a good call. We actually stayed in a separate condo (different buildings) from my parents, but for a long time stayed in the same one as them, which was...difficult. It was hard to get much personal space/time. I took lots of showers!

Dr. T said something that seemed quite wise in my one (of one) vacation session with him this week: How when you're traveling with family, it's not a vacation. It's a trip. That you might have some "vacation" time in there (like the date night), but it's not a vacation overall.

I like that you resisted having to smile a certain way in childhood photos. My mom would say I needed to open my eyes more when I smiled, but that's not how I naturally looked. So I would just look weird in some pics, trying to open my eyes more.

Today was the first day of classes. I started crying on the drive in, just like I have almost every day the last two years because it’s so uncomfortable for me there.

I also decided I’m retiring or resigning in two years. It gives me time to finish up some things I want to do here, but it’s time for a change of scenery.

Couch Workout Club day 25

Yesterday's success propelled me through three sets of my core workout exercises, with the addition of my weights.

Cool Whip!

Sorry to hear it has gotten that bad for you. A change of some sort sounds good.

Sorry to hear this @@. I do hope you can retire quickly and find some peace.

I'm sorry it's so uncomfortable for you there--it shouldn't be that way. The retiring/resigning plan seems like a good idea. Maybe having that time line will help in some way, so you can start thinking ahead to the future. Do you feel you'd want to find a similar role elsewhere (where they actually provide accommodations without a fight) or like you might want to get away from a university setting entirely?

Hugs, if wanted.

Hi, Lost. What's going on?

Hi LT,

Thanks for your message.
Just feeling the weight of everything, I guess.
This new grief terrain would be hard to deal with anyway, but not being able to discuss it properly makes it even harder.

Still two weeks to go, and then however long it takes to get my sense of safety back with her.

Hugs, Lost. I'm sorry you're having to go through this. Two weeks is still a long time. I hope the repair with her goes quickly so you can have your support back and can cope better with all that's going on.

Hugs, Lost. I understand what you mean about the time to get your sense of safety back. (I've experienced this.) It may take time before you're able to talk about everything with her.

Thanks, Scarlet.

I had it in my head that this was just going to be a brief diversion to talk about something else and then we would resume.

I didn't count on her goofing by mentioning technical difficulties so that we had to spend my one opportunity to discuss this before the break addressing my fears over that.

There's so much sodding backstory, and she's the person with the fullest picture, of course.

I never expected to have the knowledge that I now hold, and I don't know what to do with it.

Thanks, LT.

Sucks so much that this is happening now.

Couch Workout Club day 27

Got my steps in walking around the park.

Sat and sun exercised!

I plan to join the couch exercise club starting tomorrow. (Monday morning). Now that the heat is starting to break a little in these parts. (Well it’s still going to be hot through September but the early morning hours are starting to feel a little cooler). I plan to pick up walking again around the local parks. I was doing it a lot in the fall, winter and early spring-then when I left at the end of March and went into a new job I strayed from the walking but I plan to start again.

Couch Workout Club day 28

Three sets of core workout exercises.

Couch Workout Club day 29

I felt like changing it up today, so I did two sets of my seated boxing workout.

Hi Couch,

Please tell me something good.
Could do with a lift today.

Thanks.