Couch 250: An August Couch

unaluna · Yesterday at 03:21 PM

Artie, i dont know what your talking about either! I was answering stopdog. My contention is that the difference between enabling and supporting someone is whether that someone is being judged for their actions.

And in her case, yes the students ARE being judged on their technique. To me, supporting means everyone gets a participation trophy, nobody is getting voted off the island. Enabling means not giving someone bad news or constructive criticism that could help them stay on the island.

I was at a neighbors' dinner party before the covid, and i was the only bachelors degree there, everybody else was more degreed. So like all they were doing was reciting wikipedia facts - yeah, they knew more of them than i did, but they werent INTERESTING.

ScarletPimpernel · Yesterday at 04:52 PM

I also feel not as smart as a lot of people here. I didn't have too much college. And I have no professions. Plus my memory is going. But I actually like being around all the smart people here. I like learning from everyone.

LostOnTheTrail · Yesterday at 05:28 PM

Couch Workout Club day 76

Got my steps in running some errands.

unaluna · Yesterday at 05:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel

I also feel not as smart as a lot of people here. I didn't have too much college. And I have no professions. Plus my memory is going. But I actually like being around all the smart people here. I like learning from everyone.

Yeahbbut nobody can crochet like you an artie! Thats art!

ArtieTheSequal · Yesterday at 07:13 PM

i figured i misunderstood haha

so the a/c guy has been here ALLLL day working. i don't know if it's just that huge of a job, or if he's just slow. You'd think iffn it was a huge job they'd send more than one guy but whatev. As long as they get it fixed...

unaluna · Yesterday at 09:16 PM

Its very cool here today, but they say 70's next week. Again i am glad i did not convert my a/c unit to heat. With my meds and my age and my weight and my diabetes, i do not tolerate heat at all. First i get cranky, THEN i sweat!

I am surprised trump doesnt just fall over. Well its not like he has to iron his own shirts or anything, right? Its the REST of life thats hard, not just showing up on stage.

atisketatasket · Today at 12:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unaluna

Interesting! I would say, enabling involves judgment, by a third party? Support is given in a judgment-free zone.

Huh? What does judgment have to do with it.

I think it’s more like if you break your leg. Enabling would be putting you in a wheelchair because it hurts to walk. Support would be sending you to physical therapy so you recover and it doesn’t hurt to walk anymore.

Lemoncake · Today at 12:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ArtieTheSequal

i don't know if this is what you're talking about una but on the couch, there are so many here who are vastly more intelligent than I am and often I feel like I'll never measure up and that I'm somehow "not as good". I'm not fishing for anything by saying that. It's just the truth of how I feel. I know that comparison is the thief of joy and all that but sometimes it's hard.

Artie you need to learn to tell yourself a different story. The T Marissa peer said with all the clients she saw “not being enough” was their main issue.

You need to learn to celebrate yourself and see that you are worthy of your own love without X degree or being like Y. This will come with time. Everyone has different skills. I would trust my hairdresser with my hair more than a surgeon.

We set standards for ourselves which we think we should be at, but often these patterns were instilled in us from a young age by others.

I personally think journaling is good for everyone, but to raise your self esteem you need to get up and do physical things for yourself that help get rid of the old thought patterns. Things like getting a facial or a massage, or eating well.

comrademoomoo · Today at 01:58 AM

Where are all these smart people? We all sound like a bunch of clueless dodos to me (not you, una, obvs).

comrademoomoo · Today at 04:33 AM

Turns out some of us are crueller dodos than others. My cat brought in one dead baby mouse this morning and one dying baby mouse. I killed the dying one because I didn't know what else to do. I feel horrible. It felt like the less cruel thing to do, it wouldn't have survived back in the wild. I have never killed a living thing before, other than joy.

LostOnTheTrail · Today at 07:09 AM

So sorry, Comrade.

That must have been quite a shock.
I think you did the right thing given the circumstances, although knowing that likely doesn't make it any easier.

I really hope your day improves from that starting point.

Lost

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Couch 250: An August Couch

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ScarletPimpernel Wise Elder Member Since Nov 2013 Location: US Posts: 8,686 (SuperPoster!) 10 7,133 hugs given	Yesterday at 04:52 PM #742 I also feel not as smart as a lot of people here. I didn't have too much college. And I have no professions. Plus my memory is going. But I actually like being around all the smart people here. I like learning from everyone. __________________ "Odium became your opium..." ~Epica
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ArtieTheSequal Writing my way through... Member Since Feb 2020 Location: In the desert of my soul Posts: 7,565 (SuperPoster!) 4 5,975 hugs given	Yesterday at 07:13 PM #745 i figured i misunderstood haha so the a/c guy has been here ALLLL day working. i don't know if it's just that huge of a job, or if he's just slow. You'd think iffn it was a huge job they'd send more than one guy but whatev. As long as they get it fixed...
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comrademoomoo Grand Poohbah Member Since Feb 2019 Location: Toodlepip Posts: 1,814 5	Today at 01:58 AM #749 Where are all these smart people? We all sound like a bunch of clueless dodos to me (not you, una, obvs).
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comrademoomoo Grand Poohbah Member Since Feb 2019 Location: Toodlepip Posts: 1,814 5	Today at 04:33 AM #750 Turns out some of us are crueller dodos than others. My cat brought in one dead baby mouse this morning and one dying baby mouse. I killed the dying one because I didn't know what else to do. I feel horrible. It felt like the less cruel thing to do, it wouldn't have survived back in the wild. I have never killed a living thing before, other than joy.
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