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velcro003
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Default Nov 05, 2024 at 08:49 PM
  #61
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Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight View Post
Dear T,

Aaaaaaaaaggggghhhhh! I really hope we have some sense of the outcome when I see you at this time tomorrow. Glad I know we're hoping for the same one.

Love,
LT

PS: Be safe.
SAME. I see mine at 5:30 tomorrow. I am praying that she doesn’t have to cancel. Tomorrow has got to be a hard day for therapists (in the U.S)
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LonesomeTonight
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Default Nov 06, 2024 at 01:44 AM
  #62
Dear T,

I wish I was the kind of person who would just go back to sleep after waking up in the middle of the night. No, I'm the sort, on a night like tonight, who checks the news... Hope I'll be able to go back to sleep at some point...

Love,
LT
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Default Nov 06, 2024 at 04:49 PM
  #63
Dear T,

I'm glad we were able to talk about things like that. And that you were open about your reactions, too. It felt almost like a joint therapy session. Or maybe two friends talking. It was cathartic for me, to be able to let out those thoughts (including the dark one about D) and emotions.

I'm also relieved you didn't try to put some sort of positive spin on it. Like you said, the most positive you could get was still pretty dark. I'm glad you're able and willing to go into the darkness with me.

Wait till I show you what my mom said about it--maybe that will help you understand better her effect on me.

Love you,
LT
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LostOnTheTrail
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Default Nov 06, 2024 at 05:23 PM
  #64
Hi R,

In order to be a safe container, and do my work in the world...I need a safe container.
I'm still struggling to find my way back to feeling safe with you, and things like this (whilst unavoidable) don't help.

RC holds space for me beautifully, but I'm holding too much for a group.
It's too much for one person, really.

Thanks,

Lost

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Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few
A man can see his way clear to the light
Just hold on tight, that's all you gotta do...'

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'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin
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Default Nov 06, 2024 at 07:00 PM
  #65
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Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight View Post
Dear T,

I'm glad we were able to talk about things like that. And that you were open about your reactions, too. It felt almost like a joint therapy session. Or maybe two friends talking. It was cathartic for me, to be able to let out those thoughts (including the dark one about D) and emotions.

I'm also relieved you didn't try to put some sort of positive spin on it. Like you said, the most positive you could get was still pretty dark. I'm glad you're able and willing to go into the darkness with me.

Wait till I show you what my mom said about it--maybe that will help you understand better her effect on me.

Love you,
LT
I woke up at 3:30 this morning and checked the news. No going back to sleep after that.
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Default Nov 06, 2024 at 07:38 PM
  #66
You seemed kinda hopeless in your email this morning. Which freaked me out a bit. You were all like "I'll take your moms word for it" when I said she said things would be ok.

But I did use the treadmill. For myself not for you.

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Default Nov 07, 2024 at 07:55 AM
  #67
Is this you not turning up? This makes me very nervous. I know that there could be any number of reasons for this, but those reasons include the possibility that you are dumping me like the last one did. I am not sure what to do. I am not sure what the normal thing to do would be. Probably to message you with a prompt, but that feels very uncomfortable, especially given last week. I am not sure what is an over reaction. I guess I will give it half an hour and then message you if I haven't heard from you. Or, more likely, I will give it half an hour and then still not know what to do because I am thick.
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Default Nov 07, 2024 at 03:21 PM
  #68
Sorry about being like "are we done?" Kinda abrutly at the end. I needed to leave before I got sick and your lights weren't helping. I threw up as soon as I got to the car.

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Default Yesterday at 04:46 AM
  #69
Needing physical assistance and emotional support is a hell of a balancing act.

One is much easier to ask for, and the other is where I end up 'flat on my face'.

Three more sleeps until we can begin to unpack everything that happened while you were poorly.

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'Somewhere up above the great divide
Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few
A man can see his way clear to the light
Just hold on tight, that's all you gotta do...'

Steve Earle - Fort Worth Blues

'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin
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Default Yesterday at 06:34 PM
  #70
Dear T,

Wish I could talk to you right now. I mean, I guess the discussion with H went OK. But I'm struggling with going out of my way to do something for D on my way home, then to have her say, "I don't want her here" regarding me when I got home. I feel guilty for this part of me thinking, "Why did I bother?"

Hoping the therapist we're seeing tomorrow for parenting guidance will help...

Love,
LT
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