<insert grumble here>

I don't wanna go to T tomorrow. I don't, don't don't don't DON'T!

What's the point of going when she's leaving next week? Honestly?

Why not just hide in bed (or do schoolwork, which *is* productive) instead of going?

She can't make me feel any better about her going, as much as she can't make me feel any better about school stress and a few of my close friends up and graduating.

I feel like a kid. I don't want to go.

Why is the kid in me so difficult... yeesh.

Also don't want to see pdoc next week either. He annoyed me today in my psychotherapy group.

I want my OLD T BACK. I saw her ... last week? It was nice. I want to be in therapy with HER. She understands me more. But I can't, because I've tried to get back to see her... but she moved on too.

I hate this feeling of "abandonment". Such a nasty word.


Forgive my ranting, I just am not a very happy camper.

(((((((((((((( Christina )))))))))))))))

dear not happy camper - that's just what i was thinking! Why go to the week right before she leaves (which would be next week) when it's only gonna make me feel worse!? THere's nothing she can tell me that will make it better (since I don't get angry) and i will just sit there looking pleasant and say "oh sure. oh it's fine. i' am fine. no problem. " and if anything *does* come up it would be that much harder to have her be gone. After she told me last night, i couldn't find anything "deep" to work on - just surface stuff. SHe tried to get me to - but what's the point!? It takes longer than 3 weeks to process really big stuff when i only see her once a week.

ON STRIKE!! but not angry... maybe we should just call it skiving off.

Fuzzy, thanks for the hug.

Kiya, what does "skiving off" mean? Boo for T's leaving. Grumble. Hiss. Associated junk. She wants to work on my recognizing my emotions... and I am, right now. I am cranky. Or sad. Or hurt. Or SOMETHING. But I'm not telling her that tomorrow, nope. She can try to make me talk, but there's no point. Need to keep it together to make it through until... well, the end of the month. Or longer.

Grumble. Hiss. Boooooooooooooo.

Okay, I really am being childish. Sigh.

"skiving off" - skip class.... or t in this case

she wants you to work on your emotions huh? i think you're doing ok...if you can vent when you're ticked....instead of internalizing...i'd say you're doing ok.

((((((((Christina))))))))

Good idea...

Well, except when I ran into her today I told her I'd see her tomorrow...

But I can fake sick, since I am kinda sick with a cold.

Maybe.

Therapy is too complicated. Emotions are too complicated. Life is too complicated...

Christina is going to sit in her corner and hold a silent protest over her life running itself.

Apparently I don't get mad enough. And I don't cry enough. Because apparently typing it out isnt enough for her, I actually have to *feel* it. I have to sit with it. I have to deal with it.

Icky.

My emotions are good enough. So I dont like being angry or sad and dont really let myself be that way... is that really that bad?

Probably. Grumble.

((((((((((Kalamity_Jane)))))))))) thanks.

"STAY there, DEAL with it"
-Divine Secrets of the YaYa Sisterhood"