[AllyH88]

changed your personality? If it has at all.

I know that personality is more or less ingrained, but when I started researching my diagnosis (Major Depressive Disorder) I realized that a lot of what I thought had been just basic personality traits were actually symptoms of depression (eg, unhappiness, feelings of worthlessness, guilt, anger, lack of interest in anything, laziness, etc...). It was a shock to find out that I was, in fact, not crazy or evil, but just expressing the symptoms of a mental illness, which could be treated.

So, how has therapy helped you? Do you feel like a new person? Or do the same issues keep creeping up, but with therapy you're better able to manage them?

In particular, for those of you with depression, does the low self-esteem ever go away? Will I ever truly feel like a worthy human being or will I have to fight this every day for the rest of my life?

I've made so many mistakes, hurt so many people, that I want to know that I can change as a person, not just deal with the negativity and pessimism that overwhelm my life.

Thanks.

[skeksi]

My therapy has, of course, changed the way I relate to myself, but I'm pleased with the way it's changed how I am with others, too. I find that I have learned from my therapist's modeling acceptance with me, and I am much more tolerant and accepting of others. I'm not so quick to judge and I'm less likely to be hurt, because I can better see where other people's "stuff" begins and ends.

[missboots]

I can say that therapist helps me see in another way of thinking. Like when I saw her on Wednesday I was in a bad mood because I messed up with boundries crossing them with my boss. She pointed out that boss over stepped her boundries first and that confused me. So she can see how I felt I messed up. Which made me leaving feeling well I guess I need to see if others mess up the boundries and then look at me. Sometimes it isn't always me! That she made me see I'm not so bad and not to rag on me when the boss over stepped her boundry.Because I would put all the blame on me and leave the boss scott free.

[Sannah]

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AllyH88 said:
a lot of what I thought had been just basic personality traits were actually symptoms of depression (eg, unhappiness, feelings of worthlessness, guilt, anger, lack of interest in anything, laziness, etc...).

does the low self-esteem ever go away?

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Yes, you can raise your self-esteem. It is probably low because of the messages that you recevied about yourself while growing up. Anger can be expressed in therapy and it can go away too. Guilt can change if you change your thoughts about the issues that it is dealing with or make amends or whatever.

[AllyH88]

Thank you all for responding!

To know that other people have gone (or are going) through the same thing is always encouraging. It gives me hope and sometimes that's all you have to cling to.

I was wondering if you could mention what kind of therapy helped you most (individual, group, CBT, etc...) I know it's often condition-specific.

Thanks again.

[missboots]

I do individidual as well as group. I love both. I learn alot from other people and t helps with to deep issues that I wouldn't share in group.

[Mouse_]

I dont know if its changed it rather then found it?

[sunrise]

I'm with you on that, Mouse.

I don't think therapy has changed my personality, but revealed it, uncovered it. For too long I have hidden behind walls, stifled my feelings and the way I want to be, and not attended to my needs. Now I am finding who I have always been but had forgotten or kept under wraps.

[Sannah]

Good point!

[lauren_helene]

I am more needy, reliant on T and dependent...vulnerable but that is this week.

Other times, I feel stronger, more aware and happy I met him and started therapy

[phillygirl]

I think uncovered is a good term. I always felt like such a defective person and was just cursed with a bad personality. I took every slight, perceived or actual, for confirmation that I was defective. Not true, once I began seeing some of the distortions for the illness, not my essential being was flawed. I still have days where I feel like a freak but they are many less than before. And that is a very welcome feeling!