I met the most pompous T EVER yesterday!

I am getting some cognitive testing done on my memory problems to see what is going on with me, so my doctor refers me to this guy. Well actually I thought it was going to be a women, because HIS name is Jan.

Well he told me I could sit anywhere I liked, so I sat on one end of the couch closest to his desk. He then asks me why I chose that spot. I then asked him why it even matters where I sit. lol(He doesn't know I study psych in school)

I am thinking what does this have to do with my memory problems?

Well OMG this guy is sooo full of himself, I couldn't believe it. He asked if I had any questions about him, I said no, I am just here to get my memory tested. Well then he proceeded to give me this long list of his "experience". Which none of it has to do with neuro- psych training. So after his inflated ego trip, I said, so what you are telling me is that you are NOT a neuro- psychologist then. My doctor thought he was.

He asked all the general questions about past and all, and yes I do have a traumatic past. blah blah blah. Well all of sudden I am a "complicated" case because of this, he totally almost forgot to ask what problems I have had with my memory, until the last 5 minutes of my appointment. (which is why I went to see him) Now he thinks I need several sessions before he can even decide to do what tests.

Then he asks me if I feel my T is qualified to be my T with such an extensive abuse past I have had. Well I said I learned more from my young MSW who specialized in trauma in 6 mo. , than the 4 years I have worked with my old PhD's T's. Well he didn't like that comment. Then he tells me he is available if I feel my current T isn't working out.

Then he proceeds to tell me that memory problems can be caused from my allergy meds. I have been on them for at least a decade and while possible, it would be extremely rare.

Then he goes through my list of T's and asks about each one. I told him I am filing ethical charges against the first one. He then took A LOT of notes and asked things that were none of his business. I am thinking what the heck does this have to do with why I am here. Then he proceeds to tell me that he and his wife are going on vacation next week. Okay, I hear you have a wife, my unethical T did too, so what does that have to do with anything?

Did I mention this guy hardly looked at me, didn't smile, and acted like he was the god of psychology? I see right through this pompous stuff, and see a T with a very little ego who needs to puff out his chest in order to feel good about himself.

Then when I was paying, I asked the secretary what this treatment was going to be filed under. She said basically therapy. ummmm, I said I am not here to do therapy. She said since this guy is not in a medical center, that psycho testing would be under therapy. Then he comes around the corner when he heard me asking and said well lets just file it and see what the insurance will do. I said yeah, but don't I still have to pay for it whether or not the insurance covers it? My insurance doesn't cover mental health very well, I said I can't afford these fees, I am a student.

Well I was so glad to get out of there. I then called this prof. I had a few years ago. He is a neuro psycholoist and a clinical psychologist, he lives and breaths this stuff. He works in the hospital and does this testing everyday for stoke victims, accident victims, Alzheimers, etc. I asked him if he would be will to asses me even though I was a past student. He thought about it and said that he isn't a current prof. at my college and I had only one class with him, and all the grading is over, etc. Plus he knows what kind of student I am and after I told him of the current problems I am having , like getting lost driving and forgetting what letters sounds like, he said he already knew what test I needed to see what kind of memory problems I could have. Then we can rule out the physical stuff after we find out where my weaknesses are in memory . He said if we start with mental stuff first like this other guy wanted, it could take months(especially with my past) and a waste of time if the problem is indeed physical. Me and my T totally agree with this. Especially since I have had migraines for the first time and possible a small stroke last summer.
Plus I called my insurance and gave them the code of what he will be doing, and the fees are almost completely covered.

This T's office looked like a museum, I was afraid to even breathe or my germs might contaminate his air. He acted like that too. Most T's I know are pretty down to earth, but this guy was way over the top.

I told my T about this and she said has never even heard of this guy. She said good for me to take charge of my own treatment and not feel intimidated by this guy and for calling my doctor and telling him I am not going to work with this guy and who I want to.

Good for you for stepping up! I think most doctors in general don't like being questioned themselves, and see themselves as above reproach. Which is ironic considering the field they chose.

I bet this guy didn't expect you to know anything, and tried to redeem himself by comparing himself to those you've seen before. He sounds like someone I wouldn't want to ever see again either.

I actually went to a guy once, and I could hardly wait to get out of there too. I felt this weird sexual tension with him, and knew I couldn't open up to someone who looked at me the way he did. He actually called like 6 months later asking why I never came back, which creeped me out even more. I never returned his call.

I think he tried and failed at intimidating you, and I'm glad he failed. Most women are intimidated by male doctors who wind up NOT listening to their needs, and feel the need to go back and convince them of their worth.

tx is right - i think he wanted to intimidate/impress you, and i'm glad he did neither.

good on you for taking charge and finding someone else more appropriate .

Thanks Mellie,

I don't know exactly what his deal was, but I don't want anything to do with this guy. My gut says stay away! But I am laughing about yesterday, this morning though.

see...strong like stumpy!

i should have warned you that it might overflow into other areas of your life...oops. too late.

strength good. confidence good.
creepy icky dr bad. run fast.

stumpy

Well stumpy, shouldn't your name really be "big kick butt tree"? heehe

maybe...but then what would i do with my long flowing ears & short stumpy legs?????
(and not to mention my ever so confused look of: "huh? he went which way?")

trust me...they say people resemble their dogs...well lets just say that in this case...minus the long flowing ears...truth is stranger than fiction!

our legs are not that much different..only he is much faster than me & i do believe the little (insert word for illegitimate child) is more agile than i'll ever be! and i know he eats more veggies than i do...because he steals mine!

bassets...not the dog you think of (lounging on the couch doing nothing) trust me! active little beasts! and i have 2!!

stumpy

Ohhh, duh me! stumpy is the DOG, I was thinking of tree kind of stump! OR that you feel stumped...etc.

So what does it mean when you own a Newfoundland and a Keeshound? I am big hairy and lovable? lol

My puppy likes chewing on frozen whole carrots, goes nuts when she sees I have them from the store. My old man Keeshound gives her weird looks, like what? It is a frickin carrot, not a Tbone! Maybe she thinks she is a big guinea pig. lol
Well we have something else in common, both our dogs have those big puppy dog eyes! lol
I told my T that when I leave thearpy sessions with her, I come home with a new pet! She was what do you think that means, safety? I said I am just nuts, that's all!

Exoticflower
He sounds like my first T. Sterile and full of himself. Glad you dropped him! I wish I had known better and walked out of my first session instead of wasting a full year with him

wowza this guy sounds like a real quack. glad you saw the red flag!

I'm glad you found your professor to help you with your memory problems. It doesn't sound like this other T can offer you anything of use!

I'm glad you didn't stay with that T. He sounds awful. My boss does neuropsych testing (in a hospital). While my boss does do a clinical interview with the testing, he knows before the client comes in what tests he is going to have them do. The patients only come in twice, (once for testing and once for the results) It may be that this T (unethically) wanted to be able to charge more as he would only be able to charge for the hours he worked on your case. If he could get you to come back he could charge for more hours.

I'm glad you were able to find someone respectable and you trusted to be able to help you.

good on you for giving that creep the heave ho - what a pain in the asteroids!

and good on you for getting in touch with your ex prof - he sounds like someone who reall yknows what he is doing - good luck with the testing -

HI Del,

I think in the old days, I would have seen his authority as knowing what he was doing, and probably just did what he said. I just don't fall for that now, I guess we all learn eventually. Thanks for your support!

Hi googly,
What your boss does, was what my doctor was expecting this guy to do.
My prof. , the guy I am seeing this Tues, also works for a hospital, will still do a clinical interview, but it might be little different because he knows part of me already, and maybe shorter. He said he would start testing too.
I didn't even think about the extra hours that people charge just to "grade" the tests. Boy am I glad I am not going back to him. Thanks for everything, it has helped a lot!

Thanks Phoenix!

Well. . . . YUCK!! Just YUCK!! I would have felt very strange in that situation too. The man does sound full of himself. I get creepy feelings just reading about him.

Yup, I know Peaches.

This is one instance I am glad my gut feeling told me to stay away from this guy.

That is exactly what I did. He followed a certain method that was developed by some nutty person and basically said if I didn't get on board with his therapy I might was well just leave, because it was the only way to sanity. I can still picture him sitting in his chair with his PeeWee Herman hairdo writing notes and asking me if I am done with my story so we can get on with our "work". He was a Pompous A.......! Thanks

This guy actually looked like Freud. lol

Freud? sounds more like Fraud... hehehe