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Old Aug 11, 2010, 12:47 AM
hopeful2010 hopeful2010 is offline
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Member Since: Aug 2010
Location: minnesota
Posts: 6
In March of 2009 my husband flipped and hurt me pretty badly, no hospitalization was required as I was able to hide and was able to call 911. He went to jail for 60 days and then to treatment. He was discharged from jail to prison shortly after his arrival due to non-complaince and due to the refusal to believe he did what he did. He tried to tell them it was all my fault. (Mind you he had no marks, as I hadn't touched him..) So he has attempted to contact me in several different ways in which I finally decided a couple wks ago to respond because I couldn't locte him. He is protected by the HIPPA laws and all I wanted was an OFP and a divorce. I am struggling with feeling safe and there really has been no peace. When I finally did respond, he consistently blames me for his loss of freedom and says to me he took 'the bullet' for me and he will only sign the divorce papers if I give him my ring and a vehicle. What bothers me the most and what scares me the most is he thinks he is in the right. Also, shortly after he was released from prison my home was burglarized. I finally went to see a therapist through a work program; hoeever, I cannot afford to go as much as I need. I am in constant fear for my children and my dad. The other problem is my kids step-mom continually converses with him and informs him of what my children are doing, what she believes I'm doing, and I believe is feeding the fire!

Last edited by FooZe; Aug 11, 2010 at 03:43 AM. Reason: added trigger icon

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  #2  
Old Aug 11, 2010, 04:56 PM
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shezbut shezbut is offline
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Location: Rochester, MN
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Gentle hugs to you, Hopeful 2010.

I have no words of wisdom ~ just wanted you to know that you're in my thoughts. Hope that things get resolved for you and your children very soon.
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  #3  
Old Aug 11, 2010, 06:06 PM
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Ygrec23 Ygrec23 is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2010
Location: Florida
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hopeful2010 View Post
In March of 2009 my husband flipped and hurt me pretty badly, no hospitalization was required as I was able to hide and was able to call 911. He went to jail for 60 days and then to treatment. He was discharged from jail to prison shortly after his arrival due to non-complaince and due to the refusal to believe he did what he did. He tried to tell them it was all my fault. (Mind you he had no marks, as I hadn't touched him..) So he has attempted to contact me in several different ways in which I finally decided a couple wks ago to respond because I couldn't locte him. He is protected by the HIPPA laws and all I wanted was an OFP and a divorce. I am struggling with feeling safe and there really has been no peace. When I finally did respond, he consistently blames me for his loss of freedom and says to me he took 'the bullet' for me and he will only sign the divorce papers if I give him my ring and a vehicle. What bothers me the most and what scares me the most is he thinks he is in the right. Also, shortly after he was released from prison my home was burglarized. I finally went to see a therapist through a work program; hoeever, I cannot afford to go as much as I need. I am in constant fear for my children and my dad. The other problem is my kids step-mom continually converses with him and informs him of what my children are doing, what she believes I'm doing, and I believe is feeding the fire!
Hi, Hopeful 2010,

If you want 2011 to be as hopeful as 2010, you need to get a lawyer, pronto. If you can't afford to hire one, go down to your local legal aid type society and see if you qualify for free legal help. If you have a computer, which you do since you're on PC, just google "legal aid [name of your county]" and see what comes up. Otherwise just call the clerk's office at the county courthouse and ask them. A lawyer can get a "restraining order" for you against your husband. And if he doesn't want to go back to prison, he'll pay attention to the restraining order. As for a divorce, it depends on your state laws. Where I live, everyone has a right to a divorce if they just are unsatisfied with their marriage. In your state, I don't know. He says he can't (or won't) sign the divorce papers. Well, in many states he doesn't have to sign the divorce papers. You can still get a divorce from him. But that's another one of the many reasons you need to get a lawyer to advise you. Get on the phone tomorrow and find out what you need to do. I wish you all the best. Take care!
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Thanks for this!
(JD)
  #4  
Old Aug 13, 2010, 02:42 AM
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Rhiannonsmoon Rhiannonsmoon is offline
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Member Since: Jul 2008
Location: Australia
Posts: 4,135
Just put his whereabouts unknown on the divorce papers...he's a dangerous man and his wanting the ring and the car is crap... You can prove he was dangerous to you and you should be able to get a divorce for irretreivable breakdown of marriage...Give this creep nothing
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Peace, the deep imperturbable peace is right there within you, quieten the mind and slow the heart and breathe...breathe in the perfume of the peace rose and allow it to spread throughout your mind body and senses...it can only benefit you and those you care about...I care about you
  #5  
Old Aug 13, 2010, 04:31 AM
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NuckingFutz NuckingFutz is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2005
Location: Las Vegas, NV
Posts: 4,564
I agree with the above post. As far as getting emotional support, I would check out your local domestic shelter for support groups and other advocacy programs. I once knew a man like your husband, turned out he had Antisocial Personality Disorder aka Psychopath. Glad he is out of my life. Just a question; if you are still married to him, how can your kids have a step mom? Good luck and be well.

Last edited by NuckingFutz; Aug 13, 2010 at 05:36 AM.
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