[lucky137621]

So I have posted about this friend that had come into my life. I had been really guarded with my feelings and this person was like," oh we need to explore eachother", (not romantically) and" help eachother", and "you can trust me". I finally opened up and basically lost all my inhabitions and shared my innermost thoughts then he stoped communicating with me. This has been extremely hard on me. I cant seem to get this guy out of my mind. My point is that he is actually still on my facebook, and Im wondering if he doesn't want to communicate with me, why wouldnt he remove himself from my facebook? Should I remove him? I had removed him once before when I felt I was getting to attached and tried to end the friendship, but he talked me back into the friendship. So I friended him again. Im afraid if I remove him then there is no going back, but then maybe thats what I need to do to heal. Im confused...

[Rhiannonsmoon]

Hello Lucky,

Welcome to pc. Maybe it would just be best to delete him and keep him deleted. If he only re-added you so that he could ignore you then what does that say about him?

Maybe be wary of anyone who wants to lay bare your innermost being. That is an invitation to being manipulated and controlled.

Switch him off and keep him switched off so that power is yours and stays with you.

[lucky137621]

Originally Posted by Rhiannonsmoon

Hello Lucky,

Welcome to pc. Maybe it would just be best to delete him and keep him deleted. If he only re-added you so that he could ignore you then what does that say about him?

Maybe be wary of anyone who wants to lay bare your innermost being. That is an invitation to being manipulated and controlled.

Switch him off and keep him switched off so that power is yours and stays with you.

I really want to keep him switched off. Why would anybody do this to somebody? I am a very strong person with morals, and respect for myself. I never let anybody get to me like this .....never. I have a daughter and an awesome family and group of friends. But somehow this person was able to penetrate into my life. I have just recently eneded a 15 year relationship with my daughters father and Im good with that but somehow this guy who was in my life for 2 months has really done a number on my psyche. This person is working on his Phd in psychology so he knew what he was doing. Do you think that he will get some kind of karma for doing this to people?

[Fuzzybear]

Hi Lucky, all I want to say is that I completely agree with Rhiannonsmoon. Keep us posted.

[boodles]

Why would anybody do this to somebody? I am a very strong person with morals, and respect for myself. I never let anybody get to me like this .....never. I have a daughter and an awesome family and group of friends. But somehow this person was able to penetrate into my life.

Been there and done that. The biggest mistake of my life. I was always extremely careful who I "let in" and this guy finally became "trustable" and I fell in deep. As soon as I did, things changed and then for the next x number of years I was addicted to him, even though he treated me like crap. And when I backed away, he would start the cycle all over again. The back and forth and rollercoaster ups and downs were constant. It was truly abusive. But I allowed it to happen.

It took me forever to get over him. And what I know now is that I had a choice. I settled for being treated that way. I kept wondering "why???" but know this: it just doesn't matter why so don't drive yourself crazy trying to figure it out. It's a waste of your energy which is better spent elsewhere. It is what it is and beware of wondering why or trying to justify his behavior.

But most importantly, you have invested only 2 months on this person. Let that be all the time you give him. Run, don't walk, away. As for FB, delete him and resist looking at his wall. Find something else to occupy your mind and cut your losses. I can't tell you how much I lost by falling into this type of relationship. I wish I had known then what I know now.

Rhiannonsmoon is spot on.

[lucky137621]

It is unbelievable the power of true emotion. I also have never seeked this kind of support before, and I want to thank all of you who respond. You guys help alot. Im very thankful that I found this website. 2 months is such a short time and you guys are all right. But I'm still so hesitant to deleat him. I'm going to try and do it today.(note to self)" I can do this. Iam a strong person,of sound mind, with a clear vision and a big heart." This is what I try to remind myself every morning. It makes my day much better.

[lucky137621]

Originally Posted by lucky137621

It is unbelievable the power of true emotion. I also have never seeked this kind of support before, and I want to thank all of you who respond. You guys help alot. Im very thankful that I found this website. 2 months is such a short time and you guys are all right. But I'm still so hesitant to deleat him. I'm going to try and do it today.(note to self)" I can do this. Iam a strong person,of sound mind, with a clear vision and a big heart." This is what I try to remind myself every morning. It makes my day much better.

Update: So he texts me last night saying that he is sorry, and that he has been very overwhelmed with school work........ok so I find it a little hard to believe that you dont have 2 min. in the last 2 weeks to say hi!

[MichelleNY]

Lucky sweetie.... remember this... never make anyone a priority when you are only an option to them.

IMO......he's probably feeling down & lonely and he knows how you feel about him so he will prey upon you to lift his ego.

GoodLuck.. Im here if ya need to talk.