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Old Mar 20, 2011, 10:15 AM
turquoisesea's Avatar
turquoisesea turquoisesea is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2007
Location: Colorado
Posts: 9,092
Especially when I'm having trouble in other areas ie depression, I have trouble setting limits I need to be ok. When I'm not doing 100% one of the first things to go is the ability to make quick decisions. My reasoning abilities are reduced. And when this happens I make more appointments with T and I have to be EXTREMELY careful setting up gym time (gym is my medication right now).

Current situation: group I'm in scheduled meeting. Took me HUGE effort to get this done, finished that yesterday. Now they are wanting to move the meeting to the time I have to go to the gym!! And since it's tomorrow the rest of my day is already filled with other commitments to the point that there is no other time to go. I HAVE TO get there, I didn't make it enough last week (T says minimum 3x week is a good idea) and I'm tanking.

This person keeps asking details. I don't WANT THEM TO KNOW I'm going to therapy, that I am desperate to get to the gym because it's my medication. I'm terrified of the reaction and I just don't think it's necessary. I want to keep this professional and like a normal person. But she keeps asking "oh well, what's that commitment you were talking about, why can't you do that then?" She was asking about a THERAPY appointment. I mumbled "an appointment", but it was late at night so I'm afraid she might guess. *sigh*

I don't know how to deal with this really
And I keep feeling "wrong" for saying no when I'm 'just going to the gym', or 'need to eat lunch' or whatever (vital parts of my recovery).
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Setting Limits

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Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.


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  #2  
Old Mar 20, 2011, 10:51 AM
Perna's Avatar
Perna Perna is offline
Pandita-in-training
 
Member Since: Sep 2006
Location: Maryland
Posts: 27,289
If she asks again, just say/keep saying, "What other days/time are you available to meet? That time is not convenient for me." Keep putting it back on her; you don't have the time, she has to pick a different time or you cannot participate. If she keeps pushing, say exactly that, "You have to pick another time or I cannot participate". If she keeps pushing still! Start saying it in a very annoyed tone of voice and/or tell her "It doesn't sound like I can participate in this meeting, call me for the next, please" and turn and walk away.
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Thanks for this!
Can't Stop Crying, TheByzantine, turquoisesea
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