Analyzing Human Sexuality: Speculation on the Development of Sexual Preference.

I believe that we are born with our sexual preferences embedded in us. Over time, experiences and our culture either amplify those preferences or suppress them within us. In other words, a man can grow up knowing that they are attracted to other men, yet society tells him that is not okay. He can either choose to be open and go against what society deems is an acceptable relationship or he can suppress those feelings and live denying he has them. A person can be curious but I believe they are curious to only validate what they believe they already know about themselves.
Personal Experience: I personally consider myself bisexual, however, I would not admit it openly (I would probably get stoned in the community I live in). I am attracted sexually to females but cannot connect in a relationship with them. I prefer to be "in a relationship" with a man but am not extremely attracted to them. To be honest, I can please myself but I want to have that mental connection with someone. In trying BDSM, I have been able to experience something higher than just physical gratification. I was the dominant and he was the submissive and our relationship was much more than sex. I told him what I wanted and he was happy to comply. He enjoyed pleasing me and I enjoyed not only getting what I wanted but ALSO pleasing him by letting him please me. It wasn't about whippings or treating him like a dog. There are so many levels that mass media doesn't show.

Note that I am probably not the best person to be commenting on this post considering I am in a dysfunctional relationship now. Just saying what I think though.

Getting back to the original Q about how human sexuality is determined: It has been scientifically proven that homosexuality is largely created in the womb. Males are supposed to have a flushing of certain chemicals in the both the first trimester and third trimester.

Sometimes, for whatever reason, this flushing does not occur with boys. And, girls may be flushed with those chemicals instead. This is largely considered to be what determines very strong homosexual characteristics, and are evident in early childhood.

Bi-sexuality is much more subjective. Environment has a big effect on the acceptance and comfort level on individuals. I do think that most people have considered the option, in one way or another, sometime in their lives. But a lot of factors come into play about whether or not they will ever seriously look into playing out those options.

I haven't studied sexuality at all, but I have a unique viewpoint. I am asexual by definition, which means a person who does not experience sexual attraction. Asexuality is an orientation that makes up 1% of the population in America. A lot of people think that asexuality just means you don't like sex - wrong. Asexuality does not include people who are averse to sex due to trauma, or have physical or hormone problems etc - that is sexual dysfunction, not asexuality. Asexuals are people with no traumas or dysfunction, who are just not sexually attracted to anyone, basically. We have a libido, but we prefer not to involve other people in our "activities", only ourselves, hehe. I just wanted to put that out there because a lot of people argue that there is no such thing, or we are just repressed, etc. Wrong.

In terms of dominant and submissive roles, it seems to be all over the shop. Being asexual means I can look at the world without the sexual veil over my eyes, so to speak. I have observed lots of relationships over the years, both gay and straight, and it seems to vary from couple to couple whether one is dominant and one submissive. Although I have observed a lot of gay relationships to have one a bit more dominant than the other, usually I think the masculine person seems to be dominant and the feminine person is a bit submissive. I do observe it in straight couples too but I don't see it quite so often. Ofcourse, I have not studied every relationship on the face of the planet, so I can't really generalise on that point. Its just a trend that I noticed in the little sample that I have observed over the years. Could be unique to my area, I don't know.

In terms of how sexuality is decided, I have no idea! I, myself, have always been asexual, however that is just me. On the AVEN forums, most of them claim to have been asexual since they were born. However I have heard about many people who were married and had kids and were well into their 50s before coming out as being gay or lesbian. It is possible they were always gay and just conforming to society's standards of "married, kids, a nice house and a dog" and then eventually got the courage to come out. But then I also hear of other people who just realised one day that they were gay. And then you hear about people who had had bad experiences with the opposite sex and swore off them for life, and started having relationships with the same sex from then onwards.

So in summary: who knows?!