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  #1  
Old Jul 25, 2011, 07:45 PM
Meaghan3011 Meaghan3011 is offline
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Member Since: Jul 2011
Posts: 5
Hello

I am writing this as i am desperate to understand what the hell is happening to my life . we have been together for 10 years
My wife has decided to leave me , firstly she said it was because she was not happy although she loved me she just needed to be happy in life . but now it has turned out that she doesnt trust me and is jealous all the time .
This is crasy as two days before she announced that she wanted to leave she was talking about getting married having another baby holidays overseas together etc .
We have two boys 7 and 4.5 and ever since she has had the boys she has changed somewhat , Basically she progressivly became alot moodier , i never know whether she will be happy or sad or angry , she has lost interest for sex or being close and has become the most jealous person i know .
Over the last seven years i have been somewhat acused of liking or being with up to and over 10 women either friends we know or work colugues .
I have done some research on the net and i now think she may have PMDD and need to know what i can do for her and for us .

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  #2  
Old Jul 26, 2011, 06:07 AM
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Leed Leed is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2010
Location: Michigan
Posts: 6,543
Yoiks! You said she "changed" after the births of your kids -- she could have been suffering from post-partum depression. Then the depression just took over and that's been the problem.

Have you ever suggested therapy? Is it too late to ask her to go to couples counseling? Maybe she'd be more apt to go if you went to a session WITH her --- then the counselor could see what's going on and perhaps see her alone. Just a thought.

I hope things work out -- I'm sure this is a bad time for you. God bless. Hugs, Lee
  #3  
Old Jul 26, 2011, 07:40 PM
Meaghan3011 Meaghan3011 is offline
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Member Since: Jul 2011
Posts: 5
Thankyou

We have been thru this two times before where she has a bad time and leaves me but then changes her mind , but this time i dont think she will .
I have suggested counciling and basically i have told her i would do anything to help us . She is a person that has always run from her problems and not deal with them .
She will not go to anyone she has admitted to not wanting to try to fix us .
Last time i actually got her to come to a councilor with me but after a few days she hated that idea and wouldnt go again (they person brought up a few past issues in her life that she didnt want to deal with )
I know this girl like know one else i have seen the changes in her and i know in my heart that it is not the real her ( i see the girl i fell in love with for a week or so a month ) .
I dont know what to do , she has decided to leave me because she is not happy but she loves me to death .
I dont think her decision making is the real her but more affected by pmdd if she has it .
i have researched PMDD and everything fits so perfectly into when things changed in our lives and changed in her .
What the hell can i do ?
  #4  
Old Jul 26, 2011, 08:00 PM
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Rhiannonsmoon Rhiannonsmoon is offline
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Member Since: Jul 2008
Location: Australia
Posts: 4,135
Hi Meaghan,

I think the first thing to do is find someone, a professional who can actually diagnose PMDD. So many disorders have similar symptoms and a misdiagnosis is very much the one thing you need to avoid.

There are lots of wonderful people here who can and will support you every step of the way. And if your partner does have PMDD she needs assessment and medication to help her.

Hoping things turn out well,
Rhian
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  #5  
Old Jul 26, 2011, 08:14 PM
Meaghan3011 Meaghan3011 is offline
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Member Since: Jul 2011
Posts: 5
She wont go to anyone in her mind she has no problem other than not being happy .
I and friends and family know something is not right , she has what she always wanted 2 beautiful boys our new house (3 weeks form completion) and me (she says she loves me ) but she still thinks shes not happy and needs to leave to be happy .
I know her better than she does i have studied her moods and times of moods etc and i know think its pmdd but she hates hearing anything of the sort and puts the moods and anger etc down to thats what women live with get over it .
  #6  
Old Jul 26, 2011, 10:10 PM
Meaghan3011 Meaghan3011 is offline
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Member Since: Jul 2011
Posts: 5
By the way

I never metioned that she has smoke marijuana for the 10 years we have been together daily .
  #7  
Old Jul 27, 2011, 02:27 AM
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Leed Leed is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2010
Location: Michigan
Posts: 6,543
Are you 100% positive that she hasn't tried anything else?? Another drug?? When people change from what they used to be, drugs is sometimes the answer. It turns you into someone that you're NOT.

Just a thought. I've seen some people go from marijuana to stronger drugs cause the marijuana wasn't "working" anymore.

Take care & I hope things work out. Hugs, Lee
  #8  
Old Jul 27, 2011, 07:21 AM
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unaluna unaluna is online now
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Member Since: Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
Posts: 42,131
Go to Al-Anon for growth and support, see a lawyer to protect the kids and you in case she leaves. Best wishes.
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