[peaceweb602]

My mother has a bunch of friends who she feels quite close to. I know them too, and I don't appreciate the way they treat my mother. One of them borrowed some money from my mother and never returned it. It was not a large or small sum of money, but I feel it should have been paid back. I feel bad for my mother because she is thrifty and I hate watching her work too hard. She works hard and her money goes away just like that. I don't think that it is fair, however, I feel for my mother only. My mother's friend is a gambler and gambled all her money away. She didn't have money for her family and my mother felt for her and lent her some money. Her friend makes more money than my mother, twice as much, and she has a consistent job. I feel she should have paid my mother back because she has income coming in and should tell my mother the truth if there is a problem. My mother does not want to ask for the money back because she does not want to ruin the relationship. I feel it is a bad relationship, however, my mother values the relationship. I would like my mother to get back her money and have something for herself, but she won't speak up in fear of ruining the relationship. I don't know my mother's friend as much as my mother, and might not truly know what's the problem, but I worry that my mother is being used. Am I wrong? Maybe I'm not considering my mother's poor friend enough?

[Flooded]

If I felt someone was taking advantage of someone i loves generous nature, I'd be confronting them myself.

[Leed]

Hi ~ Your Mom is an adult, and she should be taking care of these issues herself. You can't get walked on unless you lay down. I'm sure she realizes that she SHOULD be getting paid back -- it's up to HER to see to it that her friends pay her back -- not you.

Perhaps she is too meek -- if that's the case, she's going to have to learn to stand up for herself - otherwise these things will keep happening.

You can tell her how you feel -- that's she's being taken advantage of, and being used, but tell HER that she has to take care of these things herself.

I know you love & care about your mom and are concerned - but she's got to "grow up." God bless & take care. Hugs, Lee