[darkwillow]

Have you ever been totally depressed and taken it out on someone you really love even though it isn't their fault?

[Raindropvampire]

Yip yip sure have. I'm 35 and it has happened more times than I care to count. I always make sure I go explain and apologize but it still ends up in hurt feelings. What's even worse is I know I'm doing it. I can feel when it's about to happen but I can't stop myself. It's like I detach and I'm not in control. I just wish I could find the magic cure to stop it from happening.

[darkwillow]

Thank you for answering that one. I am exactly like what you mentioned. it hurts me and it hurts the one I love. Next time I get that urge I will try and turn off my phone and leave it at home and go for a walk. Words are as damaging as physical pain.

[AAAAA]

OMG a million times over YES!

[Leed]

I think we've ALL done that at one time or another. I guess it's because we figure we can get Away with it! LOL The people we love and who love us will tolerate more than a "friend." But we shouldn't make a habit of it, because it gets old really quickly!

I know i've done it, and have had to apologize several times cause I knew I was doing it -- or at least suspected it.

God bless & good luck. Hugs, Lee

[likewater]

Knowing you are the source of someone elses pain is probably the worse feeling. Yeah, i' ve hurt people i love deeply because of my depressipn before. All i can do is ask forgiveness and be more mindfu so it doesnt happen again.

Yes I have done many times and I always promise myself that I won't do it again but it is something I can't seem to help, Maybe it is the BPD I don't know.

[darkwillow]

thanks everyone. it is so hurtful to be this way but I cant stop myself.

[RomanSunburn]

This is actually something I work on in therapy. My T is all about stopping, and taking deep breaths, and repeating calming self affirmations. The one I try to use is "I am calm and in control." It's definitely not easy. She also suggested I try going for walks or to a coffee place or something. But since i have a tendency to pick fights at night, that didn't work. I did go for a walk, and then to a bar where I sat and had caffeine free soda while watching the sports channel. It helped, but it's a hard habit to get into (deep breathing, calming mantras, and removing yourself from the area), especially when what we're already doing (picking fights, being mean, etc.) feels so much easier.