Complications with my mom...

Okay.. So, I am 18. I was recently in an almost 8 month long relationship... and within the first few months I lost it to him. It only happened once... and I was 18 at the time as well... and I have been having problems with UTI's lately, and yeast infections... and I thought it would be a good idea to get a pelvic exam... Which meant I had to tell my mother I wasn't the "good girl" she thought I was... I told her that my now "ex" bf and I had sex, one time. I told her while we were in the car, she was taking me to one of my college classes... But I have not done anything again... I have fooled around with other guys... But I haven't seriously had sex with them. She seemed fine in the car when I told her... and said "Well, I'm not as mad as I thought I'd be!" so.. I thought things were okay... I went on to my next class... she picks me up... Nothing. She wouldn't look at me, talk to me... Nothing at all. I understand that she is probably disappointed in me... But I AM 18 years old now, I did have protected sex. I'm not pregnant, nor do I have a disgusting disease. She makes me feel like I'm an awful person for doing what was bound to happen at some point... It was inevitable... SHe blames her parenting skills... Says she's a "failure." But it was MY choice. MY responsibility. and I have to be the one to live with the consequences of being sexually active. We have been having problems anyways... Because she doesn't understand that I am 18... I work all the time, and I have class at least twice a week from 8:30 to 3:00... She goes out every weekend.. when I'm not working... goes to the bar... drinks... makes me babysit my little brother... But when I ask for a night to go out to the Hookah bar with my friends... She gives me a guilt trip.. The whole "fine... Ill just stay home.. and do nothing..." thing... OR she says it's MY responsibility to find, and pay for a babysitter for my brother?! Like... wtf??! He's not MY kid, he's not MY responsibility! She treats me like I'm 13, not 18. I'm not allowed to stay the night with friends... be out past 2 in the morning... If I talk about moving out.. she yells at me... Neither of my parents have a job... But I do... and my mom likes to take MY money... and use it for things SHE wants... I'm getting sick of never getting to do what I want to do... and having to set my feelings aside.. so I don't get yelled at for it...

wow your mom is way out of line. I don't know, perhaps someone else will have ideas but I think maybe you might think of moving out. It depends on how upsetting your mom's behavior is to you, I guess. It doesn't sound like your mom acknowledges ownership of her part of the problem.

Good grief. Your Mom is all mixed up! You should NOT be responsible for your brother. And she has no right to take your money -- unless she's charging you "rent" for living at home.

I'd think seriously about moving out --- LET her get mad! You're going to be moving out eventually, so you might as well do it now IF you can swing it. Your Mom will get over being mad. Just remember that as long as you're living in your parents' home, there are "house rules" and she has a right to expect you to abide by them. If that means coming home before 2am, then so be it.

See if a frend can get an apartment with you to help share the costs. I wish you the best. God bless. Hugs, Lee