[Purple Heart]

This weekend is probably the saddest we’re both been since we first met. We both cried our eyes out today realising that the relationship/marriage isn’t going to work. I feel so sad I could cry a river. And I feel even more sad to see her so upset. But what can I do? My problems from my childhood got in the way unfortunately.

((((Purple Heart))))

I am sorry to hear this, Have you both tried Counselling? Maybe your marriage can be saved?

[kindachaotic]

So sorry your marriage is rocky at the moment. Don't give up, even if your spouse decides to live apart for a while. Sometimes you can each work on your own issues & then things just might work out.

Hopefully other efforts will help before it comes to that, like the counseling suggested, either together or individually. A close friend or family member to confide in for support.

Hang in there, this could have been a big blow up that will blow over after things calm down.

Best wishes.

[Leed]

I agree that you should try therapy before throwing in the towel. Since you were BOTH so upset by the failure of the marriage, it seems that there MUST be some hope left for saving it. It would be a shame to call it quits before you did EVERYTHING you could to put things right. Problems from the past CAN be put to rest --- believe me, as I've dealt with some pretty nasty things, and now I don't have to fret about it anymore due to therapy!

I wish you both the very best. Take care & God bless. Hugs, Lee

[Purple Heart]

We both saw our relationship T Friday night. My wife articulated very well the issues. Then we had a big cry today and just realised that it's not working. But so hard to accept..

[Gus1234U]

heartfelt condolences, Purple Heart~~

[elliemay]

Originally Posted by Purple Heart

This weekend is probably the saddest we’re both been since we first met. We both cried our eyes out today realising that the relationship/marriage isn’t going to work. I feel so sad I could cry a river. And I feel even more sad to see her so upset. But what can I do? My problems from my childhood got in the way unfortunately.

I'm so sorry. It is sad when things don't work out. I don't know if counseling is something that you would be interested in, but it may be worth it. Don't know.

Also, there are two people in your relationship - each with their own problems and expectations. It is very very important to realize that your issues alone are not enough to derail anything.

If, in the end, this doesn't work out, well, it just doesn't. Personally, I would not go down without a fight because love, well, that's worth fighting for - even if it's just a glimmer of what it once was.

Good luck and peace to you.

[summeryoga]

Everyone has said some great things. It sounds like there's still so much love there ... Don't give up!

[needfixing]

why not seperate for a while?
you have one on one sessions with your t in regards of your childhood.
heal yourselve first, than work on your marriage.
the love is still there.

[lexie86]

It sounds to me like you have put in a lot of effort into your marriage, and have come to realise that sometimes things are not meant to be, whether in time this may change depends. But you both seem like you have come to a very hard realisation that is best for the both of you, that does not mean that you are not upset or devastated it just means that your a wiser and better person for leaving a situation that is not right for both of you, and leaving it with the love and respect you feel towards each other still in tact, which may in time lead to a great friendship or a reconciliation. But i think you both feel like this is the right thing, so hang in there because you still have to grieve and have a rocky road ahead of you, but hold on to the belief that this is for the best as you put it.