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#1
Jan 18, 2012, 09:02 PM
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I always fund the guy that needs to be fixed or is psycho or needs his feelings babysat. I can't do it anymore. I have enough of my own issues I can't take on a myriad of someone elses issues. My most recent beau fell in love with me in 2 weeks and come to find out is completely in outer space and needy. He wants to spend every spare minute with me and is so fragile if I don't call him right back he thins I want to break up with him. Well I did. Like I said I don't babysit mens feelings like that.
__________________
 Life is a juorney not a destination--Souza "The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.". - Chinese Saying :idea2 |
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#2
Jan 19, 2012, 10:22 AM
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It looks like a self-esteem problem that attracts you to inferiority due to anxiety caused by superiority.
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#3
Jan 19, 2012, 06:50 PM
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i think you'll keep picking that type of man until you decide to pick something different. sometimes you gotta kiss a lot of frogs...
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#4
Jan 19, 2012, 07:40 PM
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I think it is very common for those of us who have our own issues to be attracted to others who also have issues...
At least once you recognize the signs, you get out quickly. Good for you! Stay focused on yourself and what you need for now. In time, you just might discover that you find people who are more secure and want to be your partner.
__________________
Never look down on anybody, unless you are helping them up. |
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#5
Jan 19, 2012, 08:18 PM
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Perhaps you pick people that you feel you can control and they are not demanding. But once you get to know them you find out that they are demanding in a very different way.
I agree with Caretaker Leo as well, give yourself more time to get stronger and perhaps you will find partners that have more balance and are supportive instead of needy. Open Eyes |
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#6
Jan 20, 2012, 09:37 PM
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I read somewhere that "Healthy attracts Healthy" and after a year with a borderline personality/ needy/controlling/manipulative guy, I had to turn the focus back on me and wonder why was I picking these guys.
They all look normal, or even better than normal at first. A "normal" or healthy person wont stay with someone with serious, untreated issues. If we stay, or keep picking them, we have to figure out why and then fix it. When we keep picking bad apples, it really is time to start looking at ourselves. I have found some good info in "Facing Co-dependence".
__________________
Lamictal, Neurontin, Trileptal, Nuvigil, Celexa and a bunch of vitamins/herbal stuff. |
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#7
Jan 21, 2012, 11:05 AM
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I think you are on the right track by realizing your boundries with men. There are many clinging types out there wanting their mommy, nurse and purse, type of guys. This is an experience for you that you learn from. Hang in there and as a poster before said; ya gotta kiss a lot of frogs before you find who is right for you.
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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