[bookofwildthoughts]

i also posted this article on my personal blog, check it out at bookofwildthoughts.com/index.php/2012/02/23/drug-addiction/couple-retreat/

I feel very scared, very disturbed whenever my wife is walking to my study. She might tell me to go do something that she will consider more useful and more important to do than me being in the study trying to work and sometimes, I agree to that. Based on the amount of time that I lose everyday daydreaming or doing nothing, just staring at the walls of my study, it serves a better purpose to do what she says rather than to do something more productive.

Hasn’t anyone been confronted to that feeling before ?? I also cannot focus for more than 10 minutes; aiding to that focus loss now is the fact that I’m being distracted every minute, if not myself, it would be someone else, not necessarily my wife, it could be anyone.

I wish I could find a solution to this issue or maybe I’m explaining things wrongly. There would always come a time when she would tell me to do something just at that particular moment when I would be working / studying. Finally, I would not be able to concentrate or focus and just be discouraged. I’ve tried to analyse myself sometimes but all in all, I still do not know what to do about this.

And above all, it’s very hard to write about all this !!! Sometimes, that makes me lose hope in working for a better life. This is where I think of taking a fix. The fix is always the best fastest solution to find a way out of any mess. This is what every drug addict will tell you and even if I don’t get any response from anyone, why should I care? Should I beg for attention? Should I start telling people that ,”Hey! Come and see my f*king blog, you bunch of idiots!” Why should I do that ? If ever people are not interested to read my blog, why should I be interested huh ? Since I look like someone on the streets, like a beggar, why must I care about people wanting to read my blog?

There are many situations like this, where the way my wife talks to me, it feels like there isn’t enough attention from my side to her. As a husband, I feel that maybe the time I should spend with her is not enough. As a matter of fact, it’s quite normal that she will do everything to attract my attention so that I can dedicate my time to her. In fact, it’s not good from my part not to devote time to my wife; it’s like she’s begging for attention in times where I’m not at work and when I need to dedicate time to her. Logically, I’m stealing time from her to work at home. Anybody would not accept that.

[Blondboy44]

I have similar problems with my wife. She thinks she "rules the roost," i.e. the home. If she wants to trash taken out, she demands it then--no matter what else is going on. If I initiate a project in the yard or around the house, she will jump on the bandwagon and assign me additional tasks which always pisses me off. Sounds like accessibility is part of the problem. If you work at home and are always available to her, that could be a key. In my case, I am retired and around the house a lot, so accessibility is certainly a problem in my case. You might consider doing your work somewhere else, maybe the public library or something