[aria83]

I had a boyfriend for almost 2 years, until July of 2011. I broke up with him then, because I was very unhappy in the relationship and felt that we should break up. The whole time through the breakup, I was really concerned about his feelings and I still really cared about him. Then, not even a month later, he got a girlfriend. I found out about it on facebook. When I talked to him about it I was really hurt. He tried to make me feel better, but really, all I remember is him saying "YOU broke up with ME."

I know it may seem trivial to some, but this situation shattered me to the core. I was deeply depressed for a few months and had to increase my antidepressant.

I think what shattered me the most was, this didn't turn out the way I thought it would. I just didn't think he'd move on like that so quickly. My therapist said something that really resonated with me a while back, and I just can't move on from this: she said, I think you are upset because You cared so much for him and tried to protect him so much. And he didn't do the same for you. She's right.

Maybe I need some kind of closure. I don't know. But I don't want to talk to him. And I'm worried I might see him somewhere out and about, run into him. He was close to my grandpa, what if he goes to the funeral when my grandpa dies. I still have not figured out a plan for if I do run into him. Everytime I think about it, I feel sick.

But one thing I know for sure, is that I do not want to let this ruin me. I don't want to become a hateful person. Or an angry bitter person forever. I wanna be happy.

[hoping4best]

I think u know the reason because u have mentioned it in this post. 'you broke up with him' and then u just didnt expect him to move on so quickly. I think that might be worrying u. But u need to say this to yourself time and time again that u wanted this. U weren't happy with him. Well, some people heal quickly and others dont. Instead of worrying about him try to focus on other important issues i hope it helps.

[Leed]

Hi ~ I think what "Hoping" said is true. The fact that he wasn't grieving the same as you were is what's bothering you. He wasn't hurt like you were because of the breakup. He moved on and found someone else. Of course that hurts!

You will undoubtedly see him at some time or another. You need to keep your dignity and just handle it with grace. Just smile and say hello, and walk away. It will probably hurt, but you can't keep living in the past. You must let it go, and move on for your own sake. I'm SURE you'll find someone that will make you happy like this guy could NOT. It was good that you broke up with him --- why stay in an unhappy relationship?

Please take care of yourself, and God bless. Hugs, Lee

[aria83]

Thank you to both of you!

[jamk1234]

This happened to me as well 5 years ago. He was my first boyfriend and first love. Within a week after we broke up, he had a new girlfriend and what seemed to be a new life. What I have learned is that boys deal with their emotions in different ways. One way is to fill that void you left him with someone else. Although it may be hurtful to you, that is his own insecurity. He feels that he needs someone to heal that pain. It took me awhile to get over my ex, but all you can do is take one day at a time and as cheesy as it sounds time does heal all. One way to get over him is to delete him from friends on facebook, get rid of his number and all of the things that remind you of him. Although it seems immature, it's amazing how empowering it is. My ex friended me a year ago and it's funny to see how many girlfriends he has gone through. It doesn't hurt anymore because I've realized that he is insecure and immature. I hope it helps! You can get through it!