[hoping4best]

Im so so sooo stressed out at the moment! I dunno what this guy wants from me! He says he loves me but wouldnt marry me because his parents dont let him to! :@ he says he misses me but NEVER texts me when he's at office! And when i text him later he responds only briefly ,but adds a short 'love u' in random texts. If i dont text him when he's at office...he complains about it even though he was Not going to reply anyway!! :@
im losing my head!!! And m soooo worried about my mental health,my career and my life!!! Initially i was happy to have him because it made me somehow to get over Eric after 2 years!! But now it seems like im chasing after him for NOTHING!! And i act like same silly, idiot and psycho girl i had been in my past friendships/relationships! BUt i dont know how to play cool when i sense that im already losing it! :'(

my God!

[confuseduk]

If this guy is making you worry about your mental health then maybe you need a break? Sometimes you need to pull away from someone to make them realise how much they miss you or that you'd leave a void in their lives. Maybe give him a chance to miss you? Make yourself go out and have fun every day, surround yourself with people/things you love to make the days easier. I can feel your hurt by continuing the way you are. But if it's meant to be, it will. Love is a dance; back and forward, forward and back but if the other person keeps pulling back and you're moving forward, it's not a dance, it's a chase. What do you do if you're being chased? You run! Pull back a bit and think if you really want this guy and how to get him. Hope that helps

[hoping4best]

@confuseduk: thankyou so much for reading and replying

[hoping4best]

I dont understand his behaviour

[Perna]

Any man that tells you he wouldn't marry you because his parents wouldn't let him; that's either an excuse and distance-holder or you don't want that boy, he's not a mature man in charge of his own life.

Too, if he insists you text him while he's at work but he refuses to reply during the same time, he's not mature. I had a boyfriend like that once; I went across country to visit him and his family and we went to the California State Fair where he got all into playing video machines in a tent! He wouldn't stop, even started begging me for quarters and when I got bored and moved away, it happened that I had been blocking the sun and he got all bent out of shape, trying to make me move back to the spot to continue blocking the sun for him to play!

I would move on if I were you; he wants a play toy for himself.

[confuseduk]

Originally Posted by hoping4best

@confuseduk: thankyou so much for reading and replying

You're very welcome hope I helped

[hoping4best]

@Perna: you've made me smile by mentioning this boyfriend of yours thanks!

[hoping4best]

He's still the same. He says he loves me and will stay with me till i get married to someone else. What the ****! :@ he says we should enjoy the time we have and shudnt worry about future. What an idiot. But he's being an emotional support for me too these days because m having hard days. What do i do??

[hoping4best]

Still confused

[Confusedinomicon]

Cut contact and leave him.

It doesn't sound like he is going to change. There is no point in putting yourself through (constant) stress. The longer you talk to him, the stronger your emotions will get for him.

[Harley47]

I have to agree with the advice given. I don't see what you stand to gain by staying with him if he refuses to ever marry you because "his parents won't let him." That's a very poor excuse, and I'd agree with Perna in calling him a boy rather than a man. He's in charge of his life, not his parents.

Have you tried talking to him about this and how this makes you feel? He might not understand that his response isn't enough. Some guys feel that a response is a response, and that isn't quite right (speaking from experience as a guy here). He might feel justified in not responding because he is at the office (again, not really an excuse IMO, but I've seen similar). Even then, I'm not sure I'd feel okay knowing up front that he's never going to propose to you...

If I were you, I would have that talk. If things don't change, cut it off and find someone who's A) In charge of their own life and B) Cares enough to not cause you undue stress and C) cares about your emotions. You deserve more than (what is in my opinion) a dead end of a relationship.

I am sorry you are going through this. I will keep you in my prayers.

[Bella01]

Sounds like friends with benfits to me.

[hoping4best]

Its over. And my heart is broken.

[hoping4best]

So he's gone. He has hurt me so much.