[Dennis P.]

It seems that I've always had relationship problems. It seems that there will be times when women like me and I don't like them and then I like a woman and she does not like me. It seems as if I can never find any middle ground.

People really come and go in my life. A wise man once told me that you can probably count the number of true friends in your life on one finger. Thats about true for me. He said the rest are aquaintances or someone who is trying to use you for what ever reason. But it does seem like everytime i get close to someone they leave for what ever reason. I don't have a lot of family that live close to me either. I have a real close friend right now that I just know something is gonna happen with our relationship, I can see it coming like a train a mile away.

I guess that I let stuff like this bother me too much. I know that if I wait that God will send me someone, or so I think. I don't know, but the waiting part is hard. I stay really busy waiting on this, and I do mean really busy. But, the hardest part is night time. Man, I really do hate coming home sometimes to an empty home, very, very hard to do sometimes. I believe that I sometimes look for relationships/friendships in the wrong places.

Any advice or other coping skills that I could use to help me through these problems.

[faerie_moon_x]

It is true. True friends and people who actually love you are so hard to find that some people never have any at all. There's that whole fairy tale mentality. Everyone will have one true friend. Everyone will have one true love.

In the end, I think the majority of people are just aquaintances (don't want to get involved deeper,) or what I call "box friends." As long as you're in the box they want you in, you're their friend. Once you go outside that box, they disappear.

Lots of people have left me as well. Everyone leaves me. I even fear one day my children will leave me. Being in a relationship does not mean you won't be lonely.

What I've learned is you've got to be good at being by yourself and you've got to get your social interaction from those "aquaintances." If something deeper comes along there is no guarantee in this life that that person won't just suddenly stop being there, either.

As for the "I like her, she doesn't like me. She likes me, I don't like her." Yes, you're looking in the wrong place. Make a list of qualities that you're looking for in the "perfect woman." Then make a list of "realistic qualities." And remember "Real relationships aren't perfect and perfect relationships don't exist."