[kdclement]

To start I am completely embarrassed and feel I don't deserve her forgiveness but a month and a half ago I started cna school along with working full time, my relationship was already fragile because we lived so far away from each other. I don't want to place blame but she pulled away from me and wasn't coming to see me as much on the weekends. Well, the first person that gave me attention I ran to and all the sudden I was gone. I left her after 3 1/2 years. I was so angry, all I could do was yell every time she tried to reach out to me. Even after I'd left her for someone else she still tried to talk to me, tried to reach me but I was gone. I feel like I wasn't completely myself and I'm not sure if I had a manic break. I had this happen in my last relationship after 12 years I left and ran to someone else. It always seems to be an old flame that takes me back to when I was young. I can't even explain what happened or make sense of it. She wants answers and I don't blame her but I'm not sure I can give them to her because I really don't remember, it all happened so fast. I was whisked away by someone that used me, didn't care and then dumped me after a week. I don't want to appear to be feeling sorry for myself but how do I make sense of my poor behavior and bad judgement if she wants to try to make things work with me again and I'm scared. I'm listening to how she feels and we've been talking on e-mail. I finally reached out to her 2 days ago and now we're talking on the phone. I want to try to find out what is going on with me. I know I need therapy but I thought this would be the perfect place to say what I need since sometimes the best therapy is from others that might be able to relate. I want to make this work but I know the only way I can is to figure out how to learn better coping skills and how to recognize my signs before they hit. My other big question is why didn't my therapist question my judgement or ask me questions about my poor decisions? I really don't understand.

[Leed]

Are you in therapy NOW? If you are, perhaps your therapist didn't ask the proper questions because he wanted YOU to figure things out yourself. He wanted you to think about what you did and come up with some answers.

If you're not in therapy, please call someone because you do seem to need some help. It would be best to go over these issues with a trained specialist.

I wish you the very best. God bless and please take care. Hugs, Lee

[Mike_J]

I would agree that a good therapist could really help you in your situation, and possibly in rebuilding your relationship that you broke.

It sounds like you have some insecurity issues, being apart from your girlfriend you started to worry, then jumped into another relationship with someone who was just close at hand.

Therapy could help you learn why you did this and how to avoid doing something similar in the future.