[Sadness2011]

I'm slowly getting over my initial devastation of being cruelly and disrespectfully rejected by my old high school boyfriend(for backstory see previous posts in this forum and "coping with emotions"). My hurt and disappointment over the way he treated me is still there, but It's not on my mind every day. I can't say the same for him though. I strongly dislike that I can't shake my feeings for this rude, disrespectful, inconsiderate,emotionally immature man. I still think about him every day, but I don't cry over it anymore and on the couple of occasions that he has tried to reach out, I've been the bigger person and replied with a simple "thanks". However, I think this instance was just the trigger or catalyst for another depressive episode because for awhile now, I've just been up and down and okay then not okay, etc. I went to my close friend's daughter's baby shower last friday, and It was held at my old place of employment. I used to work there with her and a couple of my other good friends. As I entered, she greeted me with a big hug as we always do, and both of the other girls I mentioned hugged me as well, but that was the extent of the interaction for the whole party. It felt like I was on the outside looking in on what used to be "my group of girls", and I left the party crying the whole way home. I should say that It is completely expected that she would not be able to spend a great deal of time with just me catching up, etc. because she was throwing a party. I just felt very out of place for some reason, like I was just another guest at the party. Perhaps it's just me being overreactive and insecure but I hate feeling so up and down like this. If I'm not at work, I'm just "existing". I have little to no interest in doing anything but sleeping. or being alone. I am also on psych meds for depression and ADD but even they don't appear to help for very long from day to day. Anyone else experience these wacky emotional ups and downs? Am I losing it?

[RomanSunburn]

You're definitely not alone with those up and down, all over the place feelings. Are you in therapy at all? Talk therapy, or group therapy, can be really helpful for depression, but like medications, it takes time for it to work. How long have you been on your medications? Maybe you need an adjustment? A therapist can help you come up with some good grounding skills for when you're not feeling okay. Also, my pdoc really wants me to try to walk for 30 minutes 5 times a week -- exercise has been proven to be as good if not better for treating depression as medications.

In regards to your friends, perhaps you could get lunch as a group or just one on one? I know how hard it can be to see friends get together and feel like you don't fit in anymore. Perhaps meeting one on one would be good. Also, there's nothing wrong with making new friends (much easier said than done, I know!) Perhaps take a class or something to meet new people.

It does sound like you're doing the right thing with your ex. Just keep reminding yourself how awful he is and how much better and stronger you are without him.

Try to take care of yourself! I know it's hard, I also spend a lot of time sleeping. Feel free to come here and vent as much as you want!