[laika18]

whenever i open up with people i have this weird habit... i have to get away from conversations that are going well. i don't know why, i feel tense.

When i was yonger all my old friends in high school they would lose interest in me if i was myself). well i refuse to not be myself now. is this a problem im creating?

now i sometimes get lazy about talking. i am stopping, sometimes i dont even start trying..This is getting worse?~ ?? i have to get away from guys i like... from potential friends. that has kinda been destroying all potential relationships for me for a very long time.

idk why im so sensative =/ maybe i isolating myself too much and thinking too much? so its like compounding fears or something.. does that happen?.

sometimes i wonder why i even go outside anymore

all my old friends are changing and i moved. what is this called,what do i do?

[IowaFarmGal]

Sorry you are struggling this way. I don't know what to say but I hate to see a post with no responses. Most conversations make me anxious whether they are going well or not. I hope somebody has something to suggest! Hugs!

[roads]

Conversations are how we get to know people, get closer to them emotionally--if that is to happen. If we back off from those conversations so thatmtheymdont progress, then we stay at a stalemate or the other person gets bored and leaves.

If you aren't willing to take to risk, maybe that's why you isolate. That's why I do. I'm lazy too--most people just aren't worth that risk for me.

Occasionally I meet someone who is worth the risk. Very incredibly rarely I manage not to run. That's when miracles can happen.

[Nihil]

There could be many reasons, ranging from being insecure, to having low self esteem, or having a social phobia. Personally I feel the same thing, whenever I'm around new people I feel pressure and I attempt to get away from that pressure. It's mostly because I do not have any idea what to say and I usually would rather not engage in any conversations with them because they would probably be boring.

I've been batteling these demons for about 40 years. I've founds some answers, but no solutions. Finding reasons why you are that way doesn't make them any easier to overcome. I find it really hard to click with people too, and for the past 10 years have given up trying.
If you truly want those connections don't give up trying, cause if you do, you end up empty.

[shezbut]

Originally Posted by laika18

When i was yonger all my old friends in high school they would lose interest in me if i was myself). well i refuse to not be myself now. is this a problem im creating?

idk why im so sensative =/ maybe i isolating myself too much and thinking too much? so its like compounding fears or something.. does that happen?.

((laika))

I'm sorry that you're having such a tough time being yourself.

A possibility that comes to my mind is that you've developed a hypersensitivity to being yourself. You feel very awkward and "on the spot". Rather than deal with that uncomfortability, you're avoiding putting yourself in the position in which you feel vulnerable ~ and may be criticized by others. Particularly afraid of criticism by those that you really like.

I'd recommend working through your anxiety slowly but surely. Stop avoiding meeting others. Talk about things that truly interest you with friendly people, and build your self-confidence. You may want to try working with a T, perhaps one who's rooted in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/cog...herapy/MY00194

Very best wishes to you!

After reading so many peoples stories, I have found, that nearly all of "us", on this site, feel like misfits.
With so many of us feeling this way, one would think that it should make us feel "normal" (please excuse my profanity). To know that we are not alone in our pain, our problems and our disscomfort with life it'self, it should be soothing, reassuring. Somehow though, I still feel infierior, insignificant and alone.
I just got out of the hospital, where I could not let anyone help me. I could not allow myself to speak the words which roar through my mind every waking minute.

What do I do?

[roads]

You say you "could not allow" yourself " to speak the words."
Somehow--on your own or working with someone--you have to discover why youmwithhold permission.

[laika18]

Originally Posted by burnt-up

After reading so many peoples stories, I have found, that nearly all of "us", on this site, feel like misfits.
With so many of us feeling this way, one would think that it should make us feel "normal" (please excuse my profanity). To know that we are not alone in our pain, our problems and our disscomfort with life it'self, it should be soothing, reassuring. Somehow though, I still feel infierior, insignificant and alone.
I just got out of the hospital, where I could not let anyone help me. I could not allow myself to speak the words which roar through my mind every waking minute.

What do I do?

I dynno, I think about why i cant have the friends i want way to much sometimes. And then i dont go do things like joint meetup groups i want to get involved with ><

Yeah wierd, i dont even care about having a boyfriend... Just friends i can be close to.

I know people who are like me, who have no friends but they're totally happy. What do you think of people like that?

i think im going to do volunteer or join a meetup group. Actually you know what i always SAY im going to go to a meetup group but i never do. I guess im afraid of sticking out like a sore thumb and being invisible in the background. That feeling horrifies me eek

BUT NO~~~ I' must do it. What could you do that is kind of like that? Maybe we could both comitt to something like that and then report back to each other with the gory details=o