[V_Zero]

I suffer from social phobia, although never really been diagnosed with it, I just call it that because I'm pretty untrusting of new people and IRL I tend to not associate with people readily. I think a lot of it stems from my family history.

The worst of the memories I have is of my older brother, who really was regarded as the "god" of the family. I was trained to regard him as such but the problem was that i was not regarded with any kind of respect by him and it defeated me over and over again til I gave up. I guess I suffer from self esteem issues too. I was rarely referred to by name but instead derogatory names related to my physical appearance. It became a game. I would attempt to "hang out" with the cool kids, my brother and his friends but it would quickly turn into a session of making me a butt of their jokes.

Anyone else deal with this growing up? Could this be the reason for my distrust in people?

[Leed]

i can certainly understand why you would mistrust people now. How HORIBLE to be called names like that! Your brother SHOULD have protected you from such torment -- instead it sounds like he took part in it! That's just awful ! You cannot help how you look !! Shame on your brother!!

You don't say how old you are, and/or how long you've been out of school, but I would hope that the kids have done some growing up by now. I would hope that this "name calling" is all over and they've learned that it is wrong, and it is "bullyiing." YOu cannot do that anymore!!

I was always over-weight in school. I was always the fattest in highschool, although you couldn't call me "obese." It's just that I was heavier than all the rest of my friends, and I was called names, etc.. But I'm sure it wasn't to the extent that you suffered! Still, it hurt nonetheless.
After i graduated, I didn't even THINK about anyone calling me names -- i figured that from now on, I'd be dealing with adults. And of course I basically was. So I didn't have to worry about my weight at all.

You don't have to mistrust people now. If someone DOES betray you, that's just normal in this 'human race.' But basically you'll be ok and no one will betray you or mess with you. You'll be safe and things will go just fine. Don't mistrust everyone cause that's not fair to the majority of people. I wish you the very best. God bless and take care. Hugs, Lee