[jbug]

How do you be supportive of your significant other's decision even though it breaks your heart? Rex wants to go to flight attendant school. He is tired of working at walmart as a CSM and doesn't want a desk job. I gave him the idea of going to the home office but he doesn't want that. He just got back from his Europe trip and is dead set for doing this. I don't understand his reasoning because if he's tired of dealing with the public in the store how is he going to deal with the public in a tight space miles above the earth. What if a terrorist comes on board and blows up the plane? What if the plane crashes? I don't know what I would do if anything happened to him. I don't want him to do this but it is purely selfish reasons and I know I have no right to tell him what to do but I want to scream at him DON'T DO THIS!!!! What do I do?

Jbug

[kimmydawn]

((((((((((((((((Jannie))))))))))))))))))

That's such a hard one!

One thing you can do for you, him AND the relationship is to make sure you've expressed yourself honestly. When the decisions are made, you will know that you've been clear and can work it somehow from there.

I know that's not alot, but sometimes proves helpful in the long run.

Good luck, hon.

KD

[SeptemberMorn]

Boy, Jannie! That's a tough one! I sure do understand your feelings!

Have you talked to him about this? Have you posed some of these questions to him, like still dealing with the public?

Sounds like you may not change his mind, and you're right, he needs to follow his dream, but after talking about it with him, YOU might feel better. A terrorist... well, a bullet can find you almost anywhere nowadays, and since 9/11, there haven't been nearly as many airplane crashes as there used to be... or it seems like it, anyway. They say that flying is the safest way to travel.

At least he's not threatening to learn how to surf at the age of 67, or wanting to learn to fly an ulta-light, or wanting to go skydiving one last time!

[walkswithspiritbear]

((((jannie)))) I am sorry you are in a quandry right now with this... you said he just came back from a trip to Europe.... maybe it is the romance of the idea of being a flight attendant for him.. going to new places. Maybe he just really enjoyed the flight and flying in general... Maybe.................. Talk with him about it, and then again there are very strict requirements to being an airline attendant ... he may not even be eligible but don't burst his fantasy just yet with that one, but keep that thought in mind.. hugs to you and hoping to talk with you soon Linda aka puddles?????

[jbug]

Well I got up the guts to tell him my concerns the other night. We had a good talk about it but I'm still worried. I told him about the fact that he doesn't like dealing with the public now and now he's going to have to deal with drunk people and he told me that if you are drunk you can't get on the plane and the flight's he would be taking you wouldn't be able to get enough alcohol to get drunk. He is kind of having second thoughts now anyway because he doesn't think he'd be able to afford living while in school because not all companies pay you while you are in school and he'd have to find one that did and that could involve moving and he doesn't really want to do that. He also said that they told him he would probably have to relocate and again he likes it here. I was like woohooo inside but said ok whatever you decide I'll have to learn to live with it. So maybe things are looking up.

Jbug

Take it easy and relax flight school includes hands on simulations. if he makes it throught thevery real seeming simulations he is more then ready to fly the not so friendly these days skys. A friend of mine moved to the major city near here and flunked out of the simulations. and I supported his plans ever step of the way knowing full well he would be back and finally marry his fiance and settle down with her which he did.

Also whenever someone told you that you could not do something or could not handle something what was the first thing you set out to do? If you are like me thier being against my ideas and plans set in motion my setting out to prove that person wrong. Just support him and let him make his own mistakes that is how every human being learns what their capabilities and limits are.

[(JD)]

My concern is how much you both discuss this and how the final decision is reached. So many times in a marriage, one person usually isn't listening at all and one might also not be talking (a tough way to communicate.) I hope you can work this out... perhaps finding another job that suits you both is a better solution. TC

[Lexicon78]

Express your concerns to him. You must tell him how you feel and for the reasons you feel them.

[jbug]

Myself - He's going to flight attendant school not training to be a pilot. Just to get into the school you have to take a 12 page test and make a 90% on or no school. He has someone that says if you pass the test we will give you scholarships to pay for the school but he has a car payment and some other bills that must be paid before he can go.

Sky - We aren't married. I wish we were but nope. I have expressed my concerns to him and he has an answer for most of them. The rest of them he says they will teach him. I'm still scared for him.

Lex - I am trying to talk to him but don't want it to be the only topic of conversation. Right now I'm trying to talk him into just keeping his job until he can find something else. I just got off the phone with him and I get the feeling the breaking point is coming soon.

Thanks for all your support guys in this. I am having a lot of emotions right now and don't know how to handle them all.

Jbug

[(JD)]

Ok... well still, my standpoint comes from the inability for him to share in your concern, simply because you are sharing this stuff...

I understand your concerns...there are plenty more than what you shared. I hope you are able to maintain emotional control while expressing your genuine concerns to him, and that he will HEAR what you are saying and what you aren't able to express with words. (((hugs)))