[morbid_jealous]

I am a heterosexual woman and I have a problem that wakes up me at night.I love my husband very much and after I fell in love with him I was unable to see attractiveness in men.Every man is just a normal,regular guy to me.Even by today's standarts he is very handsome,he is just normal to me. When I first told how I feel to my husband he said I am the same,I feel the same way,I don't see any other women attractive except you.They don't mean anything to me.Then later on I realized that I notice abnormal things in men.A nose bigger or longer than normal,flap ears,baggy bellies but if very much I recognize it.etc.but when I see them I only think it is not normal,weird.I don't think it is bad or ugly.But I say that there is a normal form of human body and these things I mention are not normal for a human body.For example when I see women in p*rn,They look strange to me because they have huge breasts.It's not normal,It's not the normal size of a breast.I see these things as abnormal. But later I asked questions about it to my husband,and he said to me "it is weird,strange too but sometimes some abnormalities can bother me,sometimes I may think they're ugly or bad but it doesn't mean that I find the others beautiful.I find others normal but abnormality disturbs me sometimes." and he gave an example like that "if you see a man with skin cancer,you don't think it is normal,you see the scars etc and you say "bad" but it doesn't mean that when it is normal it is beautiful,it is normal and you say 'it's OK now,it's good'.This conversation confused me.If he's really like me,find no other one attractive,is it normal to find some abnormal features bad or ugly?He says they're bad and ugly,the others are normal ordinary and you are beautiful.Bu tmy mind doesn't accept this kind of thing.If he only finds me attractive ,he shouldn't call others ugly,he should call all of them normal.It is what my logic accepts so I have trusting issues of what he says.What do you think? I checked the forum and found people who don't feel any kind of aesthetic attraction,but I know my issue is different.I have still aesthetic attraction just changed form,my beauty concept focused on only one person.What do you think? Is it logical what my husband says?

[morbid_jealous]

Originally Posted by morbid_jealous

I am a heterosexual woman and I have a problem that wakes up me at night.I love my husband very much and after I fell in love with him I was unable to see attractiveness in men.Every man is just a normal,regular guy to me.Even by today's standarts he is very handsome,he is just normal to me. When I first told how I feel to my husband he said I am the same,I feel the same way,I don't see any other women attractive except you.They don't mean anything to me.Then later on I realized that I notice abnormal things in men.A nose bigger or longer than normal,flap ears,baggy bellies but if very much I recognize it.etc.but when I see them I only think it is not normal,weird.I don't think it is bad or ugly.But I say that there is a normal form of human body and these things I mention are not normal for a human body.For example when I see women in p*rn,They look strange to me because they have huge breasts.It's not normal,It's not the normal size of a breast.I see these things as abnormal. But later I asked questions about it to my husband,and he said to me "it is weird,strange too but sometimes some abnormalities can bother me,sometimes I may think they're ugly or bad but it doesn't mean that I find the others beautiful.I find others normal but abnormality disturbs me sometimes." and he gave an example like that "if you see a man with skin cancer,you don't think it is normal,you see the scars etc and you say "bad" but it doesn't mean that when it is normal it is beautiful,it is normal and you say 'it's OK now,it's good'.This conversation confused me.If he's really like me,find no other one attractive,is it normal to find some abnormal features bad or ugly?He says they're bad and ugly,the others are normal ordinary and you are beautiful.Bu tmy mind doesn't accept this kind of thing.If he only finds me attractive ,he shouldn't call others ugly,he should call all of them normal.It is what my logic accepts so I have trusting issues of what he says.What do you think? I checked the forum and found people who don't feel any kind of aesthetic attraction,but I know my issue is different.I have still aesthetic attraction just changed form,my beauty concept focused on only one person.What do you think? Is it logical what my husband says?

Please don't say something like 'if you say too big or small,it is judging attractiveness.' It's not.It's too big means it is bigger than normal.a woman breast has a proper size for example.it is the physical form.But if a woman's breast is so huge that covers the half of her body,you can not assume it is normal.A tree has a nearly standart shape.if you see a tree that looks like a car,you see it as abnormal.An onion has a specific shape.If you see an onion like a banana you say'what the hell is it?'You can either describe it beautiful or ugly or you may not give a meaning except abnormal,weird,strange,interesting etc.

nevermind. sorry.

[Trippin2.0]

When I am in a relationship, only my bf is attractive to me, coz I am ATTRACTED (verb) TO HIM. However, I can still have the opinion that somebody else who by your definition is 'abnormal' looking can be 'good' or 'bad'-looking. It doesnt mean I'm suddenly attracted to other 'good' looking guys.Its called having an opinion,describing someone as undesirable doesnt mean he is lying about only desiring you.Attraction is a verb, 'normal' is an adjective, 2 very seperate things. Good looks dont equal attraction.