[susanne_77]

I hope you are fine thanks in advance for your help. Me (35 years old) and my boyfriend (41 years old) have been dating for 1 year in a long distance relation. However I have an older sister that tries to get his attention, and she is kind of flirting with him. Recently he came to visit me and he was so excited to meet my sister again. He could not stop looking at her, at her body and with a big smile and lots of attention when she talked to him. I talked to him and said that I do not like the way he acts with her. Thus, I ask him to think about it, to take his time, to stop our relation and then see what he really wanted. He said that he do not want to break up, because we have built so many things together and that he has that superficial experience with his previous beautiful girlfriend, and is not what he wants. However, he said, "is just that you and your sister, are so similar in appearance, and she is very attractive". I do not know what to do, because it is a chaotic situation while he is at my parent´s home I want him to act freely.
Can you give me your advice please?

[Leed]

Well, first I think your sister is being very cruel by flirting with him and basically egging him on. And he's being an idiot for falling for it. He shouldn't be influenced by her "slutty" behavior which it is since your sister KNOWS he's your boyfriend, and acting the way she is really IS slutty behavior!! Shame on her. And shame on him too.

I don't think I'd want a guy who is so influenced by a woman who gives him a 2nd look and flirts with him a little OR a lot. Who's to say he won't take her out to the barn and have some fun? I'd want a man who wouldn't give her the time of day - who would be true to ME. I'd throw him to the curb, and then go beat up my sister! (just kidding).

Just my opinion, but I wouldn't want him. God bless & take care. Hugs, Lee

[Stranger516]

I second what Leed said.

I mean anyone would love attention from the opposite sex and some people thrive off it, even if they are already in a relationship. It is kind of pathetic that he would even admit that he thinks your sister is attractive right to your face.

Get rid of this moron. There are plenty more respectable men out there in the world who you deserve, not this loser.

[Jan1212]

He said the truth, and that's a good thing - He is honest. A lot of men aren't honest, they'll say what she wants to hear...

Staring, smiling , and giving attention, is it his way of showing politeness as well? I don't see any touching or "blowing kisses". I HATE when my man gives attention to anybody else other than me when I'm right there too, believe me we all feel some jealousy, but that's part of building a relationship and getting to know each other.... but I cannot control what he feel/thinks, nobody wants to control their partners. You were right to tell him how you felt, but I just can't agree with others saying be quick to leave him because of this, unless you feel you totally cannot stand it, you decide when to draw the line ultimately...

i agree with Leed. About both your sister being cruel and your bf.

To be honest, I don't think that a man should be looking at his gf's sister and smiling when she's obviously flirting with him. It's like holding up an invitation to her and welcoming her to do more. I think most men know this too. I doubt he's so dense that he doesn't get it so that excuse is out the window.

The fact that he would act that way and THEN mention to you how attractive your sister is, that's just uncalled for and completely disrespectful to you, especially when it's so early in your relationship and it's obviously not well established yet by what you've described.

He's an asshat and I wouldn't trust him as far as I can spit.