[Hopeless_Speechless]

My boyfriend of 3 years (about to be 4) admitted to cheating on me 3 days ago. I had JUST lost my virginity to him, when he had sex with another girl. And he told me who else he had types of sex with (2 girls) and kissed many too. His reason is because he thought I was cheating on him too (I wasn't). I'm not sure if I should forgive him or let go. Please help.

[Confusedinomicon]

Why would he think you were cheating on him in the first place? It still doesn't justify his behavior.

[Leed]

Did he give you any reasons why he thought YOU were cheating? Personally I think he used that as an excuse for his OWN cheating.

Once a cheater, always a cheater. It sounds like he tried to cheat more than one, if he was "kissing" many girls -- they just didn't go further with it like he wanted them to. He sounds like a real dog to me. I wouldn't stay with someone I couldn't trust.

You can do better than that, my friend. You DESERVE better than that!!! Kick him to the curb. Hugs, Lee

[Scotty204]

Sorry that this happened to you.... What a lousy thing he did to you . If I were you you I would turn around and walk away and never look back.

[katieandchrismc]

If he thought you were cheating.. why wasn't his first reaction to question you and have it out? When I thought my partner was cheating I didn't jump in to bed with someone else! I think this is a load of rubbish personally and he's trying to get himself off the hook.

It's not going to be easy but I really think the best thing here is to let go it wasn't just the one indiscretion.. he's admitted to cheating with more than one person on more than one occasion and I highly doubt he'll stay faithful in the future.

xxx

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by Hopeless_Speechless

His reason is because he thought I was cheating on him too (I wasn't).

You should leave him because if he did what he claims he did for the reasons that he claims he had, he had a malicious intent to retaliate against you - to avenge his hurts (imaginary or not, does not matter at all), etc.

You should never stay with a person who harbors malice towards you.

[Harley47]

Bless your heart....

You should, I think, leave. His actions speak to a lack of maturity, a lack of trust, and a presence of malice. His actions to you were premeditated in an effort to cause you pain. That's very, very cold. You deserve much better than him. I know leaving a relationship like this hurts, especially when you've shared something like your first time, but this is something that is both awful for him to do and a major red flag. This says, to me, that his response to major "issues" like the one he perceived isn't to communicate with you but to employ the flawed rationale of "two wrongs make a right." That's not a stable basis for a long term relationship.

I'm so sorry. Please know you are in my prayers.

Hugs,
Harley