[maggy.ng]

My boyfriend and me have been in a relationship for several months. At first time we decided to be in a relationship, he told me he would travel with her ex, now she is his best friend. She is older than him 13 years old. They stayed together in 5 years including 1first year in a relationship. They ended about 10 years ago.

Over 1 month ago, I had my personal problem. I had to take some times to handle it. So, I disappeared from him in about 3 weeks. At that time, we still texted, emailed, skyped, e.g We kept in touch. And I found that he brought some women to his home, and I didn't know what they did. He told me he didn't do anything that cheated on me, or made me upset, e.g. But I couldn't believe him. He told me he was not sure that I was serious. Accordingly, he made that plan for themselves. However, I told him that I've been strongly serious about our relationship.

Now, he is travelling with her ex. He tries to explain to me that "they are just friends, she does like him, and wants him to be his boyfriend". But he doesn't want so. So confusing! I told him "I don't wanna be joykiller when they are travelling". He replied that "I does want call you". But he didn't do anything.

I am worried, actually extremely worried. What can I get through the hard time? How can I believe him? What should I do?

Please help me.

Thanks in advance.

[sesame]

I would say to do your best to just move on. This guy sounds like a jerk. Any guy worth his weight in gold isn't going to go traveling with his ex who he KNOWS still wants him as her boyfriend while he's still in the process of building his relationship with you.

I don't think I could personally handle being in a relationship with a man who still had such a strong relationship with his ex, especially in knowing that there were still some residual feelings involved.

I wish you the best, and I wish I had more to say. I wouldn't/couldn't believe him.

[Rose76]

I'm sorry for whatever hard things in your life that you are handling. If you "disappear" from a boyfriend for 3 weeks, then it doesn't sound like you two are very committed to each other.

I agree with the poster above about him seeming to be over-involved with other women. But - to me - it sounds like you are under-involved with him. It may be that you need to move on. Sometimes two people cling to a poor relationship just to have some security. It's not a good idea.

[Scotty204]

The fact that he's traveling with his ex extensively pretty much says everything. He sounds like he's playing you for a fool having the best of both worlds while you're stuck at home worrying what he's doing etc...In my opinion it's not right what he's doing and if I were you I would walk away.

[maggy.ng]

He said that she will be back her home after traveling and she was alone in my country. She is moody. He wants her to be honored.

I emailed to him, and he replied just only 3 sentences

"You are being silly.

You are the only one, that's all I can tell you.

I miss you very much and I wish you were here."

Now, he called me "silly". That is a junk game, try to calm me down by such a lovey-dovey words. If he really wants me there, he would have cancelled the plan of traveling with her.

I think I should wait till him come back, and communicate clearly. But I do love him. Maybe I give him another chance. If not, I have to let it go. I can't tolerate any longer.

Thank you.

[Karlam1991]

I wish you the best and hugs to you too.

Not much I can say but to let time heal our wounds
Keep us posted!!

the fact that he would travel with an ex that has expressed an interest in him in spite of you is enough. he enjoys the attention, aat the very least and the fact is something is probably going on and he's banking on your naivete.

Don't play the fool. kick his butt to the curb hun. He's a lecherous one.

[RomanSunburn]

Even if he has no intention of getting back with his ex, or is at all interested in her, it's pretty mean to the ex to spend so much time with her. I think the way he treats his ex's says a lot about how he'll treat others in his life... In my mind, he has complete disregard for ANYONE's feelings but his own.

I hope you are able to talk to him, and maybe come to some sort of solution, but remember to keep yourself as your priority. You deserve better.

[joe456]

Originally Posted by maggy.ng

My boyfriend and me have been in a relationship for several months. At first time we decided to be in a relationship, he told me he would travel with her ex, now she is his best friend. She is older than him 13 years old. They stayed together in 5 years including 1first year in a relationship. They ended about 10 years ago.

Over 1 month ago, I had my personal problem. I had to take some times to handle it. So, I disappeared from him in about 3 weeks. At that time, we still texted, emailed, skyped, e.g We kept in touch. And I found that he brought some women to his home, and I didn't know what they did. He told me he didn't do anything that cheated on me, or made me upset, e.g. But I couldn't believe him. He told me he was not sure that I was serious. Accordingly, he made that plan for themselves. However, I told him that I've been strongly serious about our relationship.

Now, he is travelling with her ex. He tries to explain to me that "they are just friends, she does like him, and wants him to be his boyfriend". But he doesn't want so. So confusing! I told him "I don't wanna be joykiller when they are travelling". He replied that "I does want call you". But he didn't do anything.

I am worried, actually extremely worried. What can I get through the hard time? How can I believe him? What should I do?

Please help me.

Thanks in advance.

Look I don't need to give a long answer to this. Leave him as he is a player. Men like this give men a bad name. He is a boy.

[adam_k]

Originally Posted by RomanSunburn

I hope you are able to talk to him, and maybe come to some sort of solution, but remember to keep yourself as your priority. You deserve better.

I fully agree. You deserve to be happy, and if he puts you on hold and treats you like your not important then I think you deserve more than that.

[maggy.ng]

Thank you all for your support. Now I know what I have to do.

[Missbest01]

there is a very famous quote which says it all: "If you are still friends with your ex - either you never loved him/her or you both are still in love".
Just leave him .You deserve to be a choice, not an option.