He Hit Me Last Night

hamster-bamster · Feb 14, 2013, 02:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gismo

that guy is a complete and utter wan*** .
show him the door & hope it hits him on the way out!

She cannot - it is not her house.

ShaunaTheShy · Feb 14, 2013, 07:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gismo

that guy is a complete and utter wan*** .
show him the door & hope it hit's him on the way out! i'am sending you courage and love, stay safe

Although I appreciate the suggestion it's not my place

ShaunaTheShy · Feb 15, 2013, 02:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006

The first signs of a dangerous abusive relationship cycle is when the victim starts making justifications and/or excuses for the abuser's behavior. "but he didn't mean to", or in your case "he wasn't even aware he did this" Ummm no unless he's a dissociative personality afflicted person and blacks out suddenly - he was aware of hitting you! Don't let him lie and convince you it was any other way. You did something that he let himself get angry about, then he reacted in kind, he hit you. Period. He made a choice and I don't believe for a second his hand "accidentally" caused your arm to turn red. O.o Please step back and see the logic in this before you're caught up in the cycle. It will keep happening if you let it. Get out now.

I never said he was telling the truth. That's why I put what he says in quotes. Thanks though

ShaunaTheShy · Feb 15, 2013, 02:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LovelaceF

Why wouldn't you dare say it? Are you afraid that he'll hurt you?

Hit, yell, throw another one of his touchy fits where he was offended by something I said, etc.

Feb 15, 2013, 04:34 AM

I think it's important to consider the circumstances, and from what you have described you weren't doing anything to even provoke him, which means that you will probably always feel afraid of an imminent beating as there doesn't seem to be a precursor to it.

I'm sorry you are afraid of him, and that your relationship is over.

LovelaceF · 09:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ShaunaTheShy

Hit, yell, throw another one of his touchy fits where he was offended by something I said, etc.

I think that if you stay with him after he hit you, then you are teaching him that hitting you is OK. You would be allowing him to get away with mistreating you without consequence, therefore he will not hesitate to do it again.

I know that you said you have nowhere to go, but have you explored all of your options? There are very often many resources in the community that exist to help people in your very situation. There are also religious organizations who can help. The Legal Aid society should be able to direct you to these resources if you are in the US.

celina strey · Feb 15, 2013, 08:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ShaunaTheShy

I don't understand what happened, he's never hit me before. Last night, I was starting to wash dishes and he thought I was giving him an attitude and he hit me in my arm and started yelling at me. He hit me so hard I couldn't help but instantly start crying. I don't remember much of what he was saying but he denied he hit me until eventually he realized the damage he did because my arm was red and he continuously apologized and held me saying he just meant to grab my arm and that he should've never laid his hands on me even if I made him angry. Even if he didn't mean any harm, he still hit me. I didn't know what to think but it has me feeling trapped now because now I know he'll most likely hit me again and he's easily angered. I don't have anywhere to go even if I wanted to leave and he knows that...what do I do? I don't feel safe around him anymore. I used to run to him for protection and now I'm afraid of him.

NOBODY has the right to lay a hand on you. If it happened once it will happen again. I have been through it when I was younger. It only gets worse.

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