[unsure35]

I am interested in a female co-worker for a possible relationship. I want to take it slow so I just asked her if she would like to just hang out sometime.She said yes and after agreeing to meet somewhere she said that something came up and that she couldn't make it. I accepted that and we set up another time to meet. Before I go any futher I would like to add that this cycle has gone on numerous times, and normally I would look at it that she doesn't want to hang out with me. Everytime that she canceles she initiates another conversion a few days later and sets up another time and place to meet. We finally met up at a restuarant and had dinner and everything went good. I asked her if she would like to go out to a movie sometime and she said yes. She texted me a few days later and asked about seeing a movie on valentines day. I should have expected it but she called and had another excuse.

I'm confused. I don't know if I should keep trying to pursue this relationship. Everytime we have something planned she cancels with excuses and then intiates another time and place to meet only for her to cancel again.I know she has some mental issues and I do to. I'm telling myself that maybe its her disability contributing to this situation but now I don't know what to think.How should I deal with this?

[wishingtobegentle]

Sometimes maybe you just have to ride it out to the extent that it feels right. And use your intuition about where you think she's coming from.

Good luck to you!

[adam_k]

Maybe instead of going out you talk to each other on the phone? You could get to know eachother that way.

[hamster-bamster]

Skype, too.

[maggy.ng]

I think she likes you. At the beginning of my relationship, I often canceled plan with my current bf. Cause I was not sure about him and the relationship. And I want to drive it slow, like you want, too.

Take time to know each other. Good luck

if it were me, i'd have given up by now, haha. this has happened before to me and the guy wasn't interested but didn't want to say it so he just kept making plans with me but they always fell through. then i found out he was interested in someone else. meh.

that happened in high school, though, so i wouldn't say you're going through the same thing. though i'd think that people who are old enough to be working should be old enough to keep up with their previous engagements.

if she's just forgetting that she had other things going on, and thus schedules dates with you, then maybe there's hope. but if she's scheduling things after making plans with you and ends up avoiding you...meh, that would be a deal-breaker for me.

good luck.

but one more note, the man who is my husband today made plans with me for valentine's day a few years before we started officially dating, and then bailed on me. granted, it was for his ex-girlfriend, but anyway...we're married now, so, uh, i guess that worked out xD but that was like six years ago.

[adam_k]

Could be something else, maybe social anxiety? Or being too nervous about going on a date? I was always shy and I got really nervous before a date. I think the only thing you can do is your part and hope she likes you.

On a side note, I used to work with a guy that gave me some pretty sound advice once. His exact quote was "Don't put your peter in the payroll." Work relationships are complicated for everyone involved. Nothing stops people from doing it, but if she is afraid of something happening because she works with you too, then it may be why she is hesitant.