Why do I still want her back? Will I ever get her back?

So this is kind of a long story if you have time and want to listen and help me out that would be awesome. Its about me losing my best friend and how I want to get her back in my life. Im 26 and my best friend Lindsey is 30. I met her in March 2010 and by the time Christmas 2010 came around we had become best friends. We loved hanging out with each other and became very close. In April of 2011 I lost my mother which was a very hard time for me. Lindsey was there for me like no one else was. She really helped me get through it. Within this time I began to develop feelings for her. I didnt say anything about it because I really loved our friendship and didnt want to ruin it, or put and pressure on Lindsey. Over the summer of 2011 we did everything together even went on vacation, and I was pretty sure she felt the same about me, however I still did not make my feelings known to Lindsey. Around March of 2012 I couldnt take it anymore and I told one of her girl friends about how I felt. Her name was Kelly and she said that pretty much everyone knew how I felt and that mostly everyone thought Lindsey felt the same and that we would be a perfect couple. This was good news to me but I still didnt feel right to put pressure on Lindsey if she didnt feel the same. And also this mite sound crazy but I really needed and wanted her friendship, it was something special like I never had with anyone before. This brings me to where everything went wrong. June 2012 I took her to a family party, this was not the first time she had met my family in fact she had met them plenty of times and got along well with everyone. One of my cousins pulled Lindsey to the side without me knowing and asked her what was going on between us, when she said nothing my cousin spilled the beans to her, telling her how much I liked her. This really scared her and she told me that she felt that our whole friendship had been a lie, and I only was her friend because I had feelings for her. This couldnt be further from the truth and I told her this but she did not believe me. She said she felt like I told everyone about my feelings but her and that wasnt right. When I told her my reasons why it wasnt good enough for her and she said we could not be friends anymore. I sent her countless messages saying how sorry I was and that I knew we still could be friends over the course of last summer. I stopped around September because it started to get pretty bad between us. I sent her a xmas card but she did not reply to it. This was the last time I tried to talk to her, but I still miss her every day. I wish I could forget about her but I just cant. I know it has nothing to do with my feelings I honestly want her back in my life as a friend. Is this wrong for me to feel like this? How could I get her back?

please help me to get over her..how can i do it?

While my situation isn't quite so similar, I have recently had to say goodbye to a friend, and it's been more than difficult for me to do so. I don't know if you need to give her space and time to sort out what she might perceive as a betrayal (it may not be, but from what you've described, that may be what she sees it as).

Perhaps you can give her a (temporary) final means of contact. Write her a letter. Be honest. Tell her that you didn't want your feelings to override what was a wonderful friendship. Thank her for her friendship and what she did for you over the course of your relationship. Apologize for not being upfront about your feelings. But don't beg and plead...simply tell her that you understand her need for the space to consider anything you may have written, and when she is ready, you'd like to talk about what happened.

I desperately want my friend back in my life, but sometimes we have to do what we don't feel is the right choice for us, and just say goodbye. I hope that she is able to come to terms with what has happened and will return to your life. If that's the case, promise her and yourself that you will be open and honest with her.

thank you