What can I do?

I've mentioned in other forums that I'm a 31 year old virgin male. I would give up everything short of my family & close friends to have both sex and true love. Unfortunately, I can't seem to get beyond a first date. Worse, no one will ever tell me anything beyond "no chemistry." I need to know what I'm doing wrong. I'm beyond desperate for love, and I've already passed the prime of my life looking for sex, I feel like the biggest piece of trash that exists. Most of my dating has been through online, but I guess women date multiple guys, in which case I don't have a chance.

What a shame you think you have "passed the prime" of your life. "I guess women date multiple guys, in which case I don't have a chance" is an odd thing to say (and conclude) so I think you need to have a frank talk with a man close to your age who can be honest with you. By the way, many, many men date multiple women. Please see if one of your male friends will observe your manner around other people and then give you some honest observations and advice.

Let me clarify the statement you quoted: what I wanted to say was that while in the online dating process before committing to a relationship, women will go out on dates with multiple men (and vice versa). In terms of my body type and my personality, I just don't seem to measure up. I just don't know the right approach. I try and talk about aspects of common interest, asking questions to get to know her better, answer her questions about me, and act in a very polite and courteous manner at all times. Yet it seems to get me nowhere.

Just my opinion, maybe try not to come off as being in a position that you feel like you are running out of time. YOU ARE NOT! Promise. Keep somethings a little private in your conversations as the odds are in your favor, just hang in there.

Thanks I never talk about running out of time or anything personal in my dating conversations. The funny thing is conversation is generally casual about our lives & common interests, yet it seems to bring about very few second dates. I don't want to go all in on the first date obviously, but is there more I should say/do?

Hello,

I am 31 years old just like you. I never dated in high school and not much in college. After graduating from college I had one boyfriend. I started to think that I would never meet anyone. I watch family members and friends get married. I felt just like you. Like I was running out of time.

Some one I know offered to set me up with a person from their work. At first I was not interested but finally gave in. We have been dating for over 2 years. So I guess my advice to you is to spend time with your friends. They know the best. When you meet a person for the first time, just have fun. Don't be looking for the long term. That tends to freak people out. Take things slow and be yourself.

Thats all I have. I wish you all the best. You will meet someone. Don't rush. You are not running out of time.

It is OK... look, you still have plenty of time:

File:Comparison gender life expectancy CIA factbook.svg - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Once again, another date, and looking like another skunking I'm just at the end of my rope; what should I talk about on a first date? If it's common interests, it's too boring; if it's stuff like what a woman seeks, then it's kind of weird. Please help. I'm ready to give up on dating forever, who would want to date a virgin guy (and no I didn't mention it in the least in any conversation)? I want, NEED the emotional joy of love and sex, but I feel like I wasn't put on this earth to enjoy that aspect of life

I am afraid you will need to explore her interests even if you find them boring, because it still still better than taking about what she seeks, which is kind of weird.

You're not pass your prime. I know a very successful 40 year old virgin male. I know a very successful 36 year old virgin male. They are not unattractive. They just haven't utilized the best methods in finding potential dates and brides =) I used to have a housemate that never dated. When she was 35 she met her future husband at her cousin's wedding and she got married a year later. She had never dated before that and she was a virgin when she got married at 36. Love comes into each of our lives at different times. Personally, I wish I never dated half the guys I dated since I was 17. I'm currently engaged to get married now and if I could I wish he was the only man I never dated and slept with. So I envy you actually. You should wear your virginity as a badge of honor. You're saving the best for last. So don't go out there and sleep with just any woman willing. Take your sweet time and wait as long as it's going to take and give it to someone who is well worth it. So you won't have any regrets. Because I certainly have regrets. It's all a matter of perspective. Also, try to avoid online dating. That's usually a recipe for disaster. Consider dating options that allow you to meet the person face to face. And then take it slow. It took me 5 years to get engaged. It took 4 years to become intimate. I prefer taking my time so I don't have any regrets. Good luck. And you're not trash and pathetic. I envy you. You're young and in your prime. Don't give it away to just anyone.