[hamster-bamster]

Just curious. Thanks.

just plain 'ol sex?
I mean, I never have had one but I am just going by my gut here.
And probably people not feeling so alone for one night, maybe...

[daniellegillespie]

Different for girls then guys and different for age
Young girls (18-27ish) usually mistake sex and love so one night stands could be a "If I sleep with him eventually a relationship will develop" or a take charge method like "I do what I want (snap snap snap)".

Older women (30-50) a one night stand would be a lot about just needing to get some and not really concerned about the reason why or with whom or it could be for an emotional purging after a bad breakup or divorce. Getting back on the ahem, horse so to speak.

Young men (18-29) for fun. Euphemisms galore such as "getting some town bronze" "sowing wild oates", "getting seasoned", etc. etc. Young guys generally just want sex with as many people as are willing to let them. (generalization not a rule)

Older men (30-50)...no idea.

[Perna]

What is the "point" of any relationship? There does not have to be a point. It must feel good to someone, meet some need of theirs or they wouldn't engage in it.

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by Perna

What is the "point" of any relationship? There does not have to be a point. It must feel good to someone, meet some need of theirs or they wouldn't engage in it.

If it feels good, people would want more of the same, no?

[herhusband]

Probably the same for men 30-50 as well. Same situation as a woman.

[Perna]

Which is why people who enjoy one-night stands often have multiple one-night stands. "What" feels good may be different for different people; I'm sure some enjoy the sex, some the anonymity, some closeness to another they don't have to sustain, some might have an "addiction" and enjoy the release of tension; there's probably a zillion "reasons".

Some people might enjoy multiple one-night stands, others may have had a fantasy that did not play out well and so be leery of that sort of relationship in the future; some might have been "bored" and just went along with the flow rather than think about it at all. Some might have met someone and they both enjoyed the evening enough to try to sustain it, not be just "one-night".

[Silent Void]

Pretty obvious. Sexual gratification.

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by Silent Void

Pretty obvious. Sexual gratification.

it is not obvious at all because positive experiences such as sexual gratification should in general be repeated. What Perna offered did make sense though.

[RomanSunburn]

In college, alcohol plays a huge role. My husband had a fraternity brother and they did a study abroad together. Apparently, it was quite frequent to hear "I can't believe I slept with Roman's Hubs' Frat brother last night. I was soooooo drunk" from several different girls....

[Perna]

I don't think anyone sets out to have a "one-night stand" except those for whom the physical/psychological need for sexual gratification is so great they seek the experience but don't want any possible hangups of knowing about the other person and their life.

Many sex addicts and those in the throes of certain mood disorders pursue one-night stands specifically for the sexual gratification.

Too, though, there are the Charlie Sheens of the world who just enjoy sex and find other like-minded people or, there are the dishonest that pursue one-night stands but the other person does not know that is all that is possible with that person.

Some people get drunk or otherwise impaired and engage in such behavior and regret later but don't otherwise change their behavior so it is less likely that they will lessen their inhibitions in the future and have a better chance of not ending up having sex.

Married people might want the extra/"different" sex but not the hassle that comes from disturbing the marriage.

I think that there may different reasons for different people - us humans are a complicated bunch and I don't think there will ever be a black and white answer to this question.

I can say from my own personal point of view that I had a one-nighter once. I'd found out that my then fiance had been having an affair and I'd dumped him. I felt low, not sexy, unwanted and not good enough, and I had a one-night stand with a bloke who I knew liked me from the way he looked at me whenever I saw him in the pub.

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by riotgrrrl

I can say from my own personal point of view that I had a one-nighter once. I'd found out that my then fiance had been having an affair and I'd dumped him. I felt low, not sexy, unwanted and not good enough, and I had a one-night stand with a bloke who I knew liked me from the way he looked at me whenever I saw him in the pub.

that makes sense

[BonnieG2010]

depends if you ask about lifer one-night stander or occasional.

For the occasional you've had good responses already.

As for the lifers, there are people that cannot come too close, cannot share some real intimacy with their partners.
The only way out of solitude is a one night stand.
It's not much, but they something is better than nothing and they can get the idea that they are ok, feeling great and enjoying life at its most.
Except they cannot really afford a psychological bond

[seeker1950]

I never could do that. Never wanted sex for the sake of sex, and always hoped to build a relationship first. Even having done that, though, the relationships often went sour!