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  #1  
Old Jun 26, 2013, 02:21 AM
THEIDIOT77 THEIDIOT77 is offline
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I have been excellent in academics and my career. I have recently taken a career break after careful planning. I love to read and travel .I have decent finances and a good partner.

My problem is that increasingly I can't stand being with people. Like AT ALL!! While I have always liked my own company (and dogs'), now I absolutely drain out after an hour with people.

This break is lovely: I spend my day reading, writing, playing with my dogs, taking small walks. But it has made me want to stretch it for life!!

I know it is not people but me. I know some very smart, intelligent, nice, charming folks with diverse interests: colleagues, relatives, friends, acquaintances. While I am usually interested in the topics we discuss (personal, social, books, movies etc.) and on an abstract level really love them: face to face or phone to phone just washes me out. No matter how good a conversation is, I feel pressurised to act. Being with people just arouses anxiety in me which I find baffling.

I daydream about being a recluse. But being in early thirties I am not sure if I will eventually feel bad about missing out. Because my profession as well as my interests ( other than reading/ dogs etc.) require socialising / networking : I feel as if I am turning my back on good things. Out of sight, out of mind.

My partner thinks I should socialise a bit and not get this feeling of boredom become a habit. And I suspect he is right.

But in my heart I feel I will be most content as I am right now. Little human contact and my own world without any person to bother about.

I was wondering is there some disorder in me? Should I seek help? Read books?>

Believe me, this need to shut out people completely has become so strong that I am ready to try out anything which makes sense to me.

Any advice?

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  #2  
Old Jun 26, 2013, 12:50 PM
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sunrise sunrise is offline
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Does this feeling extend to your partner?
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"Therapists are experts at developing therapeutic relationships."
  #3  
Old Jun 26, 2013, 02:20 PM
THEIDIOT77 THEIDIOT77 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sunrise View Post
Does this feeling extend to your partner?
Occasionally.
  #4  
Old Jun 27, 2013, 03:19 AM
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possum220 possum220 is offline
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Sometimes I feel being around people can be very draining. On the other hand being alone alot.......... like for days on end alone..... can drive you potty. So it is good that you have a partner.

Being a hermit will affect your mental health. So its trying to find the right balance of company and being alone. Being alone can rest your mind too.

Good Luck
  #5  
Old Jun 27, 2013, 02:23 PM
hamster-bamster hamster-bamster is offline
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Loneliness in old age has been shown to be worse than most things that are considered bad for your health in general.
  #6  
Old Jun 27, 2013, 05:48 PM
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RoseBee RoseBee is offline
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Since you enjoy your alone time, have you reflected on WHY you feel this way? You have asked if it's a disorder or if something is wrong, but have you seriously asked why, and thought it out. The answer could be as simple as other people and their incessant noise drive you insane and coping with it is draining you. It could be as difficult as you don't know why, but others just irritate you. Either way, talking to a counselor about it could help. I know when I went through my alone phase, I did it because I was depressed. I didn't feel depressed, but I just didn't want to deal with people. When I was alone, I was happy.
Thanks for this!
JadeAmethyst
  #7  
Old Jun 30, 2013, 06:27 PM
adj2013 adj2013 is offline
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I am in the same boat. I think I am just fed up with people. Also it is work to have friends and I'm not willing to do it right now.

As others have said, it's bad to isolate. I want social contact at my convenience. That sounds selfish but its just the way my mood is- I can't help it. One day I'm overconfident and happy as a clam, the next -0 confidence, anxiety through the roof, and it seems my brain was shut off cuz I have nothing intelligent to talk about.
Hugs from:
hamster-bamster
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