[Nimo]

HI people

I have too many things to tell,but I'll try to make it short
So I'm feeling not well but I don't know exact psychological term of what I feel and I call it depression (maybe it's not correct)
I am 31 year old man, I have a five year old daughter.
An year ago my wife left me because of problems we had(we lost 4 day old baby who was born with problems in lungs), and not because of the third person.
A week ago my ex wife called me and suggested to take our daughter to the health resort for a week. I agreed and we went there. during conversation she told me that she is having some hormonal problems because of not having sex for a long time (from the time we drifted apart)
So when I suggested to have a sex, she agreed but said that nothing will change in relationship,just sex and nothing more and we will never live together anymore.
During five days till I was there she was extremly sensitive and great during sex and extremly cold after and before it. We decided to continue our relationship that way but this situation blows my mind. first 2 days of our journey, I was complitly lost, I felt extremly bad, could not sleep at all and I dont know why is that but It's a fact.
In addition she told that she does not see the problem if I have another partner( I dont have) but added that during our sexual relationship she'll
be faithful to me.
What is that???

[Benetduncan]

It's normal after a long relationship to fall back into each other's arms. When you break up and you are confronted with being alone and looking for a couple, it's natural to relapse into the past relationship, because well... who knows you better in bed than the person you were married to?

The strangeness of it all and the contradictory message she is sending is maybe a sign that she is as confused as you about this, but she's coming from a defensive position (most likely because she left you), while you are not, which explains why she might be cold before and after.

Would you like to get back together? Have you told her how this uncertainty is making you suffer? You should think about what is best for you, so that you can be a good and stable father figure for your daughter.

Originally Posted by Nimo

We decided to continue our relationship that way but this situation blows my mind. first 2 days of our journey, I was complitly lost, I felt extremly bad, could not sleep at all and I dont know why is that but It's a fact.

Please listen to your own words... and look after yourself. If this situation is too damaging, then stop it. Sounds like she is a bit mixed up, and she needs to sort herself out before embarking on any type of relationship, even just sex and I wonder if you still want to be together, so the coldness is hurting too much?

And.. I can think of no damaging ill-effects on hormones from being celibate, I think any ill-effect she may be having would be psychological.

Good luck, and please be careful. You guys have to have a relationship of sorts because of your daughter, and I hope all of this doesn't make things harder for the future.

Hugs.