[TheL1126]

Hey everyone,
Im new here, looking for some honest advice. Ive been with my boyfriend for almost 5 years, but for 3 out of those 5 years, I feel like we fight more than we are in love. I have tried to communicate openly and respectfully with him recently, but he has an EXTREMELY short temper. He also forgets things so quickly. It gets frustrating. I have been trying to get to the bottom of this, making myself believe that it was some sort of mental disorder. I obviously cant approach him about it, because thats highly offensive for someone to hear. Every time I would try to communicate with him about how we could work on our relationship, within the drop of a hat I feel like he changes into someone I no longer recognize, it sometimes reminds me of a horrible temper tantrum a child would have. I always try to calm him down, but it gets worse, and he cusses a lot! Its scary. I have been putting up with the cursing for what seems like years, and he has promised me and sworn on his moms life he would stop, but not even 2 days later it starts back up. It makes me feel SO depressed and worthless. I don't know if i am in denial and afraid to get out of this relationship...anyone with similar experiences? What did you do?

[jadzea]

My husband and I used to argue all the time even though we were madly in love. One day I told him I did not like this situation. He said he did not either. We made a decision at that time that we would stop arguing. We did and things are so nice now.

Anger, yelling and arguing can be habits that take effort to break. When you BF yells at you ask him if he is upset with you and then discuss the issue. Tell him you do not like being yelled at and that you will leave the room if he starts. Sometimes all you have to do is remind him he promised not to yell.

If things are too bad and they are impacting your self esteem (it looks like they are) you may want to consider leaving. What benefit do you get from the relationship? Is it worth giving up the things you are losing to stay with him?

[deelooted]

I agree with jadzea- 5 years is a long time, but don't lose anymore time on a relationship that hurts so much. And who knows, breaking up with him may be the best thing for the both of you- you get to move on and heal, finding a better relationship, and he may finally see that his problems are his own doing, and not those around him.

A break may even bring the both of you closer Be strong, and be the love you want to see in the world. Blessings to you