How to talk with BF about ADD

I've been reading up on ADHD/ADD and have come to see that I still have some of the traits. I'm ok with that and just gives me more justification for my decision to seek help. My BF thinks I don't need to but I know it's me who knows what I'm going through. He is only seeing me through the eyes of someone who has just met me a few years ago and has no idea who I was as a teenager. I really don't want to be medicated again but if after speaking with a doctor and they feel it's best then I'll do what I have to do.

I also have to deal with his family, well his mom really. Lets just say the mom and dad divorced a few years back and he dad has gone off his rocker. His dad has problems that I'm sure of as how he behaves. So, the fact that I might also have a small mental illness, the whole taboo of mental illness! I'm "normal" but I'm not! I know I'm not and I don't know if it's I've got ADD or I'm really not as smart as I think I am.

Yet, there is also some people surrounding us that say we all have some mental illness why do we need medications. Which once again I can see their point but it helps some people sometimes. I also think it's about the money we don't have for me to find and speak with a doctor. My mom who thinks I should find and speak with a doctor will not help. It was more important for her to help me pay for dental work I needed done... I'll pay her back but I can't even start trying to ease the payments of my school loans once out.

I feel like I'm ranting but going nowhere on this one. I'm even lost myself! I hope you can make heads of tails of it here.

How can mental illness be taboo, but cancer not be? Weird.

If you're still experiencing some ADD symptoms, it's a good idea to check with the Doc. Even if you don't have to go on medication, they may be able to give you some focusing techniques to help.

Money ... gotta love how we as a society will spend billions treating the flu, but then wonder how something like Columbine could happen. I wish I knew how to help on this subject, but mental health is extremely important and should take top priority in my opinion.

I am not sure why you talk about the taboo of mental illness so much with respect to ADD. I do not have ADD (I am towards the opposite end - able to focus on something very well and for a very long time, unless anxious), but I have friends with it, friends whose kids have it, friends whose kids do not have it but a teacher suggested they might in the past, etc. etc. I have former co-workers with ADD.

So ADD is not even fully a Mental Health issue. ADD can be viewed as a neuropsychiatric disease that neurologists, not necessarily psychiatrists, can treat. It does not carry as much stigma now as, say, schizophrenia with hearing voices does. It does not carry as nearly as much stigma. Colleges routinely offer accommodations to ADD/ADHD students in the US, per ADA (Americans with Disabilities Act), and saying that you are ADD/ADHD is almost the new normal. Cf. saying that you hear voices, special messages from the radio and tv, etc. is NOT the new normal - it is severely abnormal and carries a huge stigma with it.

Look at this:

Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Whom do we see on the picture? A nice schoolgirl trying to focus on her homework. We do not see a locked unit or an asylum.

Your mom is being irrational in prioritizing dental work over having you see a professional who might help with ADD/ADHD, since your level of academic achievement might suffer if you indeed have ADD/ADHD but do not receive help. So by withholding help, she is risking your academic - and then, occupational - future. Not cool. It is not that teeth are not important, though - both things are important.

I agree about the whole ADD but my boyfriends parent(s) are abit behind the times lets say. His mom is French and has been a French proff. at colleges in the local area for 30 odd years yet she likes to leave things that are past her understanding alone. Such as using a computer, she has one but always getting my boyfriend to help her send e-mails and even print things. So to her it's a taboo still. Then it's how she talks about his dad who is crazy. The thing is knowing little about ADD/ADHD and from how she viewed a friend, who was ADHD, that I helped out... yeah these things don't help matters.

Then my boyfriend is just worried that I'll end up getting bad advice. The problem is I really do have ADD as borderline as it maybe but I need help. Be it I get medicated or just about to speak with someone about what I could do... I just know that how I've been dealing so far is starting to note work.

In the last year I've nearly been fired twice and nearly placed on academic probation once. The almost fired things were reasons I caught myself doing and was trying to fix when my store manager decided that I was lazy on the job. Then after my lead stopped them they found away to take me out of the department. I only spent a week or two out of the department before my replacement was fired and other things happened. Then my lead fought to have me back in her department. I was taken out of the department after telling store management I had ADD.

It's just been a hard couple of months and year

I have a friend who takes ADHD medicine as a PRN, when she needs to focus hard. Apparently, it can be used this way - it is not a "all or nothing" proposition. Just mentioning.

Just see a doctor then? You can ask for it to be administered as a prn and only use it when you are in school or something similar.

I have slight ADD (inattentive type) and most of my friends agree that I do. A lot of people have shorter attention spans now because of technology. The internet provides instant gratification.

Your boyfriends input should be noted but ultimately it is your choice to take medications. If he finds any negative changes after an initial trial on medications then I would think the advice would be more helpful. Unless he's paying for the psych appointment I would go ahead and do it anyways.

Hammy is right though. The stigma towards ADD is a lot less severe then other mental illnesses.