Is it wrong to flirt online when attached IRL?

Join a knitting club or gym if you want something to do to feel good about yourself

Thinking about that some more actually, and I don't think it makes someone untrustworthy full stop. That's a bit dramatic IMO. I am trustworthy. Just a bit of a flirt when the moment is right....like I said it aint no heavy s***! And I am sure many of you have done it yourself without even realising it but the problem is some ppl like to take this moral high ground when in fact they have probably been guilty of such a thing themselves. It's just I am honest about it and it has conflicted me so asking opinions. Not a bad evil person.....just insecure and crave attention. There is a story behind some actions...its not black and white.

Hahahahahaha! Yeah might just do that

Are you implying you are "special" and the rest of us are sheep?

I can form my own opinion AND chew gum at the same time

I would venture to guess the OP has not discussed this with her H, so going behind his back and doing whatever she wants probably isn't a good idea. Especially if it means breaking his trust (which is reasonable to deduce since she had to take a poll). It is hard to recover a relationship once the trust is broken.

You know what, this is doing my head in now and will just keep my mouth shut in future. Meant to be playful not stressful...so you'll be glad to know I am converted. To hell with it.

You asked for opinions. I shared mine. If my S/O were flirting outside the relationship, it would be over. It has nothing to do with sitting up on a high horse or looking down on anyone. It is an issue for me. And if my S/O or H didnt respect that then we would have nothing more to discuss.

We would have known these things about each other eons ago, too, so it would be a non-issue.

In addition, if I second-guessed my own actions, I would err on the side of caution. Clearly, inner gut is telling you (me) something.

Cheers

Yes and I appreciate your opinion thank you. Just sometimes it's not easy listening to some opinions when they hit home. Thanks!

I am leaving this subject now, I have what I came for, I want to thank all that have voted and shared an opinion. It has helped me look at my behaviour and want to reconsider with my current behaviour.

Thanks all

Bye!

Depends on if they are doign something in hiding or secret. Doing something that in no way you would do in front of your significant other would be teh deciding point. If one likes to flirt and the husband/wife knows and doesn't care then this point is very true, it's not going outside the bounds of expectations within the relationship. The problem with trust is when it is done in hiding.

Justification of something someone is feeling convicted of usually comes with such statements, but the fact that this question of whether it's ok is asked raises the question of whether you're sure of it or if you're looking for support so you can feel ok about it. Only you can know if that is true, but I'm just saying as it appears. The idea that you're pointing out in more than one instance that this ain't no heavy ____, kind of underscores my statement.

Honestly there has never been a time when I've flirted and did not know of it. if I did something that was misinterpreted at some point as a flirt and I didn't know it, that's not flirting, thats the other person's perception of it. While I've admittedly made mistakes and ventured into the realm of flirting in the wrong situations I've always been aware of doing so and I do whatever I have to do remedy the situation by stopping, going away or what not.

No one here, especially myself thinks you're evil or bad. You're saying you're honest about it though adn I ask you, are you really? would you or have you told your SO about how you like to flirt? Is he aware of this and would you be so honest as to tell him so? Honesty with us is moot... as we don't matter, none of us will wake up on the other side of the bed with you nor have to live with you every day of our lives. Your husband and your honesty with him though DOES matter. As you've said before you've never cheated, and i give you respect for that but truly it doesn't matter what we think of whether you flirt or not, but your husband does matter in this.

I'm not implying anything about anyone in particular. Since no one is going to write a lengthy treatise on the rationale behind their decisions on an Internet forum, it's hard to tell who is and who isn't. But let's face it, 95% of people are sheep. They cling to their beliefs without reason, often because they don't even know how to reason effectively (which is largely a failing of the education system rather than of the person).

I'm just saying that taking a poll of people's beliefs is not the best way to determine an answer to the OP's question because most people won't have very good reasons for their beliefs and because of the short-form nature of forum posting, it will be difficult to tell which ones do if any.

A poll like this is not a very good way to figure out the answer to these types of questions.

((((HT)))) I understand. I don't think though a dissertation was necessary when asking / answering a question of this nature. It wasn't very complex.

The poll as posted was b&w (not everyone voted, though), but I think those that responded, responded thoughtfully, whether it be based on experience or values (or both)!

One of the best things I have learned here is to NOT be a sheeple. And to think for myself. That is one of the reasons I am here! It feels so good to be able to share a thought / opinion and not be put down, invalidated or dismissed for it (however, clearly, by my ? posed in response to your response, I am still sensitive but am working on it).

Anyway, the bottom line is that I hope the OP received food or thought and some good input that helped!

Yes the OP did

Whether it was the right place or not, I got what I came for...so thanks!

According to my girlfriend it is. I got in trouble liking and commenting on other girls pics on facebook.

Sorry ((((allme)))) Allme > OP

This.
I would also add; I'm not even sure about the emotional disconnect. People do get attached online and there are countless examples of wrecked marriages because one party started a "harmless" online flirt, fell in love with said person and ended up in a very real bed with them.

Even if it never go that far; it carries the risk and - ultimately - it hurts the existing partner.

It is essentially cheating and I would never, ever tolerate it.

Would you like the same thing happening to you? Finding out that your husband has been romantically involved with another woman online?

I understand what you are saying about your needs. If your marriage is not fulfilling, I believe the solution is addressing that first.

WT?? After 20 years of marriage I can't even THINK about flirting with my husband
I did quite a lot of online flirting and it is wrong and dangerous OK...but life just gets boring sometimes.
(dangerous because it's easy to develop feelings and then you don't know what to do with those feelings)

Flirting... lol.. What is that even like?