[CordisWords]

Yeah, so my therapist says I worry too much and maybe I do, but really need some advice about...yeah. Here goes:

So, I'm on the academic team in JROTC and I'm the only girl. And two of the guy asked me to Homecoming. Bill is a Sophomore and Drew is a Senior. I'm a Freshman. So somehow I created this crazy love triangle type thing.

Bill has joked around and said that he thought of me as a guy and that I looked like a guy (I don't) and Drew invited me to his LAN party which has fun and I met a lot of people. Either way, I told them both that I would think about it.

If I choose either of them, it'll be awkward for everyone during a academic team. If I just hide out in my house for homecoming, I think I'll have burned bridges with both of them and it'll still be awkward.

Yeah...maybe this isn't the place, but I'm really freaking out and I have no friends to ask since I just moved. Please, any advice?

[Trippin2.0]

Since it seems you don't mind going with either of them, go with the 1 who asked you first, that way the second guy was just too late and not rejected. Hopefully he's mature enough to understand (first come first serve so to speak) and therefore there's no awkweirdness at all.

[healingme4me]

I'd probably go with the one, that didn't tease and say they thought of you like a guy. Teasing, at the beginning of a relationship, whether it goes that far or not, is not a good way to start.

[Trippin2.0]

Sometimes teasing is just a playful way of starting a convo when you don't know what to say...

Little boys tease little girls to get their attention, some boys don't outgrow this completely.
My bf teased me on HS 10 yrs before we started dating, sometimes he still does. It was harmless then and its harmless now.

Not all teasing is bad behavior.
Anyway my point is don't discount him on teasing alone. Judge the actual teasing, was it his useless attempt at flirting or conversation (I'd say because you said there's no way you could be mistaken for a boy) or was he infact being mean? ...Which I have trouble believing because who asks someone they dislike to accompany them to homecoming?

Anyway, while teasing can certainly get out of hand, I wouldn't right someone off simply because they teased me to get my attention, if the teasing was offensive and hurtful, that's a different story and then they'd deserve to be written off.

[healingme4me]

I just haven't had success with those that started off, in a teasing way, innocent or not. In the OP's case, if I personally needed to choose, the other boy, already invited her somewhere and she'd met people. I'd personally, go with the tease-less approach.
May seem, in good fun, may be innocent, I see it as a boundary crossing, from the get-go.

[Trippin2.0]

I get that and I respect that, its just that we don't know exactly how it played out and so shouldn't impose our boundaries or baggage for that matter on the poster.

What if, just what if he's a very nice guy who in an awkward moment said something stupid to a girl he liked? Should he be written off for putting his foot in his mouth? And just because we may have had bad experiences doesn't mean this is such an experience.

The poster is at an impressionable age and should be discovering her own boundaries instead of adopting those of strangers with probably very different life experiences.

Idk, I just like to look at all angles and consider all options before imparting info that may influence someone elses life. I'm not trying to belittle your post or your experience, just asking you to have an open mind until the poster says the teasing boy is a mean jerk and she doesn't know why she is even considering him as her date...

[healingme4me]

Well, I certainly wasn't implying that the little 15/16 year old sophomore boy, was a mean jerk.

She asked for advice. He's not written off, she asked opinions of who to choose or to just 'avoid' the homecoming altogether.

And, I will refrain from bring my own 'baggage', as an example of long term playing out, for now on.....

Originally Posted by Trippin2.0

I get that and I respect that, its just that we don't know exactly how it played out and so shouldn't impose our boundaries or baggage for that matter on the poster.

What if, just what if he's a very nice guy who in an awkward moment said something stupid to a girl he liked? Should he be written off for putting his foot in his mouth? And just because we may have had bad experiences doesn't mean this is such an experience.

The poster is at an impressionable age and should be discovering her own boundaries instead of adopting those of strangers with probably very different life experiences.

Idk, I just like to look at all angles and consider all options before imparting info that may influence someone elses life. I'm not trying to belittle your post or your experience, just asking you to have an open mind until the poster says the teasing boy is a mean jerk and she doesn't know why she is even considering him as her date...

[Trippin2.0]

Nevermind, I wasn't trying to offend you, thought Imade that clear. I would've been outright offensive if I was though. I was just asking to keep an open mind before judging the boy based on teasing because little info was given on it yet it was seen as an instant negative. I'm sorry I really wasn't looking to stir up conflict.

OP, I'm sorry for hijacking your thread, my POV seems to be derailing and hijacking more often these days and I sincerely apologize.

I will refrain from any further posting here, its really not helping anyone.