[whiteroses40]

Hi Friends-

I'm feeling guilty again because I feel that I have a decent life. I care for my mother financially she's a breast cancer survivor (i'm 1800 miles away from her) she's unable to work doesn't qualify for short term disability or social security and is a widow. I also care financially for my adult college age children whom I'm about 900 miles away from them. For all the good I'm going and the struggles I go throught to support my them I can't help but feel guilty when I buy something nice for myself or do a random act of kindness for myself. It's a curse.

I'm a child of an alcoholic. My father the alcoholic, passed away two years ago from liver cancer. This may be part of it but I'd like to stop feeling quilty. Does anyone have any insight as to why I feel this way and has anyone overcome this feeling. I'd like to enjoy the feeling of joy when I buy a pair of pretty shoes or purse without feeling awful because I treating myself. I feel sorry for my mother and my kids.