[InvisibleButterfly]

Today has been one heck of a day. I have a boyfriend who lives with me and my two kids (20 and 14), they are grown 'kids'. At any rate, I've been with this guy for nearly 6 years. In these 6 yrs, he has had so many jobs, it is unbelievable. When he gets fired, it's always someone elses fault. (according to him) He also has a pack and a half a day habit with cigs. Ok, he had this one job at a fast food place as a manager about 10 months ago. He got fired. Well, a month ago, he saw the owners wife and she told him to call the owner because she feels that he'd hire my bf back. So, that's what he did and he was re hired as a manager to this place. To me, jobs are hard to come by and he should be grateful that he got this job. All he has done is complain about this job. It's too loud, it's too busy, everybody treats him like he doesn't know anything. Then, about 3 wks ago, he quit smoking. He has been doing great. Today, he buys a pack of cigs and says if he is going to continue working at this job, he has to smoke. It makes NO sense to me. Why quit, not have one single cig for three weeks and then suddenly start smoking again.

Now, the last time my bf was fired from a job was about a month ago. I nearly lost my daughter. She got so ticked off about it, she almost moved out. Reason is, she gets school checks. It never fails that my bf loses a job around the same time these checks come out. I am on disability, I'm unable to work. So, I don't know what else to do, but, use the checks to pay bills. I told him today...if he loses another job, I'm packing up, I'll put my stuff in storage if I have to and live in a hotel. I'm so sick of him not being able to keep a job. I guess today I'm angry because of his attitude. He should be grateful that they gave him a second chance and they aren't being rude or mean to him. They are helping him and giving him an opportunity. For him to complain about the whole thing just gets on my last nerve.

I'm so hurt and so angry right now. The cigs and the job situation is giving me a headache. I have decided to just put my foot down. Thanks for 'listening'.

[Poppy Princess]

Sounds just like my father when I was a kid. Always a new job and it was always someone else's fault.

[lsamson]

Originally Posted by InvisibleButterfly

Today has been one heck of a day. I have a boyfriend who lives with me and my two kids (20 and 14), they are grown 'kids'. At any rate, I've been with this guy for nearly 6 years. In these 6 yrs, he has had so many jobs, it is unbelievable. When he gets fired, it's always someone elses fault. (according to him) He also has a pack and a half a day habit with cigs. Ok, he had this one job at a fast food place as a manager about 10 months ago. He got fired. Well, a month ago, he saw the owners wife and she told him to call the owner because she feels that he'd hire my bf back. So, that's what he did and he was re hired as a manager to this place. To me, jobs are hard to come by and he should be grateful that he got this job. All he has done is complain about this job. It's too loud, it's too busy, everybody treats him like he doesn't know anything. Then, about 3 wks ago, he quit smoking. He has been doing great. Today, he buys a pack of cigs and says if he is going to continue working at this job, he has to smoke. It makes NO sense to me. Why quit, not have one single cig for three weeks and then suddenly start smoking again.

Now, the last time my bf was fired from a job was about a month ago. I nearly lost my daughter. She got so ticked off about it, she almost moved out. Reason is, she gets school checks. It never fails that my bf loses a job around the same time these checks come out. I am on disability, I'm unable to work. So, I don't know what else to do, but, use the checks to pay bills. I told him today...if he loses another job, I'm packing up, I'll put my stuff in storage if I have to and live in a hotel. I'm so sick of him not being able to keep a job. I guess today I'm angry because of his attitude. He should be grateful that they gave him a second chance and they aren't being rude or mean to him. They are helping him and giving him an opportunity. For him to complain about the whole thing just gets on my last nerve.

I'm so hurt and so angry right now. The cigs and the job situation is giving me a headache. I have decided to just put my foot down. Thanks for 'listening'.

Hey invisiblebutterfly,

I'm not saying anyone is in the wrong here or professing that I know you but maybe you should take it a bit easier on him sometimes.

I know that his smoking habit and his ability to not keep a job is annoying, but he is still providing for you. He still has to work at a job that he probably doesn't like to bring in money. He may complain a lot but that could be his way of blowing of steam at the end of the day.

But I also think it is good that you are putting down your foot. Just try to have a conversation with him but be understanding and listen and let him complain a bit. Be firm but kind and just let him know whats up, do it in a calm and collected manner and have a bit of a plan of your conversation before hand. Try not to let it get out of control and turn into a fight because that won't help anyone.

Hope everything turns out good!

Cheers, Luca