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#1
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Hello,
First to my issues, have to warn you though it has no paragraphs since mozilla had the noscript disabled while i wrote it (i only have 3 posts so i can't even link it on this site ![]() I'm tired, depressed, lonely. My life is basically down to wake up, eat, smoke, browse the net, smoke some more, play games a bit online, work (when there's anything to work on since it's freelancing), smoke, go to sleep. Next day repeat. Now if you read my introduction thread, you'd know i'm kind of stuck in the house and i've tried several things to get over it and go back to a normal life, and nothing worked. At this point i sort of gave up hope that anything will change about that subject. However, i still have some hope i might be able to find someone to love, to love me back, and everything else that comes along. The problem is this person would most likely have to have similar issues to myself since i doubt a completely functional person would be interested in someone like me. Now to the question: How would you go around to find yourself a partner that might be suffering from the same issues or might be interested in having a relationship with a person in my position? I can't exactly go to dating sites and say.. "hey let's meet, o wait i don't leave the house, all i do is sit between these 4 walls, we're not really gonna go out or anything really, just sit at home and talk and .. yeah".. |
#2
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A partner with the same issues? I doubt most people with "issues" are actually suitable for each other. I'm sure even if you get out of your comfort zone just for a day you'll feel much happier. I'm not saying "get out of the house immediately and start talking to everyone you see", that's just weird. Although do get out of the house for once, that actually does help.
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A "Stephen Hawking institute of technology"? That's ****! |
#3
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I've actually tried that, for several years. Guess you didn't really read my introduction thread which basically summarized the last 9 years of my life.
And sadly, no, it didn't help. I can't link to it directly since i don't have enough posts here, but it's in the new member introductions section of the forum. |
#4
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I've read everything you have posted. You say you have tried doctors. Did they give you a diagnosis? Like depression perhaps? One thing about that is there would by an Rx that actually might alter the chemistry of your brain and lift up your mental state so that you can see things differently. The hard part of that is finding the right one for you, but this is a place to start.
Also, taking those baby steps of making yourself get out everyday, not just for cigarettes, but somewhere that there are people. Even the park, or library to find something different to read. Or a book shop. No, it won't do everything you want, but it will get you in the habit of getting out and out of your comfort zone. It is important to do this. You seem to have turned so inward on yourself that you are having trouble getting out. It would be a worthwhile effort for you to find an interest outside the house. People meet when they share something in common. You may not think you have any interests, but by looking at something like, MeetUps.com you will see there are all sorts of things people do, just because they want to share an interest they have with someone else. It's a place to explore what others find interesting too. Even bike riding is in there, along with many other things,(cooking, Legos, languages, movie watching) so see what is going on outside your four walls. The world won't come to you, you do have to make a little more of an effort if you want to find friends and especially a girlfriend. Girls like guys who have interests to show them, even a movie or gamer collection. You are young and still have a whole life ahead of you. That may sound hollow to you now, but you can turn this around. It is up to you. So make the call. Ask for help if you need to. Don't give up because you've tried before. You just didn't find the right thing. I'd start with finding a doctor who can treat what sounds like depression first. This will be huge if you can get a handle on it. It may change your life. I wish you only the very best as you explore ways to get the life you want. Keep me posted, I'd love to hear... ![]()
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It only takes a moment to be kind ~ Last edited by NWgirl2013; Oct 17, 2013 at 06:26 PM. |
#5
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Thanks for the recommendations. As to your reply, yes i was diagnosed with depression. I was given medication and while it made me feel better by making me number and more tired, it didn't help much with the actual problem. As for the rest, i don't really plan (at least for now) to give it any more tries into changing myself and pushing myself to do things i don't really enjoy just so that i can maybe "be slightly less broken" than i am right now.
Now on to what i mentioned earlier, i'm quite sure there's a few people who aren't necessarily in the same situation as me, but who are busy with work taking up most of their lives and also don't frequently go out to bars/clubs and whatnot, completely ignore their social life but at the same time would like to have someone to spend their limited offwork hours with and enjoy their company. Problem is, i got no clue as to how i could find these sort of people, hence asking for advice. Thanks for the meetups.com suggestion, will check that later and see if it's something that would work towards my goal, and if i can find people from my country/city most importantly. Normal dating sites probably wouldn't work (or maybe they would?) no idea, so was hoping for a bit more help from that particular PoV. Again, even if i'd go out, it's not like i'm gonna meet interesting people just by having random walks around, with no group of friends/acquaintances and without going to socializing spots like i previously mentioned .. you get the idea. And a bit offtopic... I gave in and actually called an escort over. I'm gonna spare you the details, however i must say that it's hilarious (maybe wrong choice of words) how she managed to fix me more in a single day than a psychiatrist/psychologist couldn't in over 1 year of sessions. That evening i was able to go out for a walk, alone, for a couple of hours, really far away from home, feeling great and with absolutely no worries about the world around me, the people (and yeah i live in a bad neighborhood as well so it's not all paranoia), not feeling dizzy, worried about my issues. It's like i went back in time to my normal self 9 years ago before any of these issues started ruining my life. Obviously i don't want this to turn into a normal occurence since a) it's quite expensive b) it's not exactly what i'm looking for c) it could end up messing me up even further in the "grand scheme of things" just having meaningless sex with random women all the time Thanks. Last edited by JohnDoe85pc; Oct 25, 2013 at 03:14 AM. |
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